Comfort

Today's blogtember prompt is "Friday, September 20: React to this term: comfort. ".

I really wrestled with how to answer this prompt. I had a lot of different ideas and kept deleting posts. I decided, though, I need to just let it flow.

Because of my anxiety issues, there are very few times when I am 100% comfortable. I am almost always scanning the room for signs of disaster. I question the things that come out of my mouth again and again until I drive myself crazy, worrying that I said something wrong or that I hurt someone's feelings. In large group settings I hold back from speaking up.

There are two places where I feel 100% comfortable. And they are very different.

Church. Something about walking into church just allows me to breath a little easier. I feel a sense of peace and belonging. I know that not everyone has this feeling, and I feel for those people. Because trust me, there are plenty of places where I walk in and feel my skin crawling. But Church is the opposite of that, and I thank my parents for raising us in church. I don't go every week, but when I do go, I benefit. It's not even always about the sermon or the message- it's about being there and feeling God's presence. It gives me time to reflect and pray, to talk to God.

The second place may seem silly, but it's going to a concert. I know. Roll your eyes. But seriously. At concerts, I don't care who is next to me or around me, I completely slip into this world where it's just me and the music. Most of my friends can tell you that they have witnessed me dancing, singing, screaming at a concert. It's actually quite a sight. Something fuels inside of me when I'm at a concert. I come out of them skipping, smiling, and wishing the night could last forever.

At this point in my life, my idea of comfort is putting on a pair of sweats, curling up on the couch and watching mindless tv shows while sipping on wine or coffee, hair pulled back in a bun. I get comfort out of the people I surround myself with, so my favorite nights are the ones where both my roommates are home and we just laugh. I love when my whole family is in one room and we are sharing stories, giggling and just enjoying our time together. I love eating lunch with my coworkers every day and venting, encouraging each other and having a sing a long. Those are the things that bring me comfort. And music. Lots and lots of music.