Saturday, July 31, 2010

to live would be an awfully big adventure

Right now I'm sitting on my couch, listening to We The Kings. All of my stuff that was once in my room is now in various bags and boxes in the room next to me. My bedroom is completly empty, ready for a new volunteer to move into. All my "end of the year house duties" are over. No one else is here. The boys have moved out and Katie is on an overnight trip for her work. That may seem sad, spending my last night in Detroit alone, but I think it's what I needed. It's given me my own special time to reflect on the year and say goodbye in my own way. Quite perfect, actually.

It's over. The new volunteers are just a few miles away at orientation and will move in next weekend. It's their turn to breathe in Detroit and to touch a few lives on the way. I'm so happy for them, and excited for their new adventure. A year ago, that was me- nervous as all heck, with absolutley no idea what to expect. So hard to believe a year has gone by so fast.

Here are some of my favorite memories of the year, some not directly related to MVC:
-Meeting the JV's at Church
-BBQ at Mike and Amy's
-Laurence meeting Bono
-Awkward party at Dean's where we all met for the first time
-Building a fort with some of the JV's to watch SNL
-First open house party
-Meeting Kelly Clarkson and having my face rocked off at her concert
-Halloween party at JVC house
-Archie in Ann Arbor with Sam
-Nate's work Christmas Party
-Noel Night
-Adopt A Family Project with kids
-Lady Gaga Concert
-Laurence winning the M.A.D. award
-Jason Castro in Ann Arbor
-Grayling, MI in Feb
-Retreat at McCauley
-Surprise visit to see Sam
-St Patrick's Day (cabbage with Frank!)
-Spill Canvas concert (even though I was beat up)
-Imogen Heap concert
-Cristo Rey Garden Party
-Silent retreat
-Walk for Lupus
-Transition Retreat
-Jordin Concert
-last day of school
-volunteer ceremony with sisters of mercy
-closing open house party
-every spirituality night
-every day at cristo rey

Here I go...a new adventure. Wish me luck.

Day 27- The Friendliest Person You Only Knew For A Day

Um. Skip.

Day 28- Someone that Changed Your Life

Dear Melinda,
I already wrote you one letter here, so I won't be too repetative. Just know that you did change my life, I am so grateful for you, and I love you. Thank you for helping me find my strength.
Love, Meggie Banana

Day 29- The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to

Dear You-
I wish I could tell you everything, but you would never understand. Oh well.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

play like a champion, matt.

I got a phone call today from my best friend Sam that really shook me up. She called to let me know that her ex boyfriend, whom she had dated for six years, passed away yesterday from cancer. He had cancer while they were dating, but it came back after they broke up. Sam had no idea how sick he was and she had to find out about his passing via facebook. That poor girl. I cannot imagine how she is feeling right now, how his family is feeling. I broke down after I hung up- partly for her pain, partly the fact that none of us said goodbye, and partly the realization once again of how quick life can be.

I've known Matt since I've known Sam. Us girls lived just a few buildings away from him and a few of his friends, and we spent many of our nights walking back and forth between our apartments. Matt was kind of like an older brother to all of us- we loved to tease and joke around with him, and we'd give him an evil glare whenever he and Sam had a little disagreement...because, as her friends, we were ALWAYS on her side. I spent some time today looking back on some of the funny memories with how one time we made him put Jordin Sparks "No Air" on repeat, or made up a dance and song demanding him to take us to taco bell. He listened to Sam and I fangirl over our American Idol stories, he even came over to watch it with us. I have a lot of good memories with Matt- he took care of us if we had a little too much to drink and, along with Sam, bought us Rockband for Valentine's Day.

One of my favorite things about Matt was his love for Notre Dame. It was something we had in common, something we could talk about- even though I didn't know that much, I could nod along and pretend, since I came from a family that bled Notre Dame. I remember that year when we knew him really well, the team was pretty bad, and all his friends would make fun of him for liking ND, but Matt ALWAYS stood up for them. I loved that. One of my favorite things was using his bathroom at their parties (he only allowed Sam and I, HA!) and Sam and I would secretly sit on his bed and gossip. EVERY time, I'd see his giant Notre Dame sign and start to cry because it made me miss my brother...then I'd go downstairs and tell Matt just that. He probably got really sick of it, but he'd always just smile and say "I know". I also loved how much he took care of my best friend for me, how much he loved her. I think he'll always love her, and I know that he is looking down from heaven. Matt, please keep watching over her. Be her guardian angel. And please, please go give Amanda and Laurence big hugs.

Rest in peace, Matt. I promise to "play like a champion" for you every day.

"You already know this but this is the most important game of your lives, no excuses do the work. Our lady of victory...
[all] PRAY FOR US. "- Rudy.

I've had way too many young people around me pass away. With each one, it is another reminder of how quick life is, how precious life is. Please, friends, do not take things for granted. Hug. Love. Laugh. Cry. Be grateful. Tell every single one of your friends how much you love them today, because they could be gone tomorrow. Pick up that phone call, send a letter, make a road trip. Make the time.

Day 26- The Last Person You Made A Pinky Promise Too

Dear Alayah and Marisa,
I pinky promised that I would visit you in school this year, and I will hold that promise. I am proud of you two. Thank you for making my year so memorable. Keep up the hard work. Hugs.
Love, Auntie Megan

Also, everyone should do this.

. Post a list of up to 20 books/movies/anime/TV shows/video games/bands/teams that you've had an obsessive fannish love or interest in at some time in your life.

2. Have your f-list guess your favorite character/member from each item.

1. American Idol Season 6 -
2. American Idol Season 7 -
3. American Idol Season 8 -
4. Rent -
5. Babysitters Club -
6. Laguna Beach -
7. Glee-
8. Harry Potter-
9. The Spill Canvas-
10. Wizard of Oz-
11. Full House-
12. Nsync-
13. Hanson-
14. Mean Girls-
15. Harry Potter -
16. Red Wings-
17. Tigers-
18. Spice Girls -
19. Disney Princess -
20. Disney Character -

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

watch me fly

""if they tell you dreams don't come true, just look them in the eye and say watch me fly".- Watch Me, Michael Sarver

As I was babysitting today, I found myself telling one of the kids something I've been told a million times before "I know he's being mean to you, but you just have to ignore him". We've all heard that before, most likely when we were younger. Why then, do we so easily forget that as we grow up? People are still mean. Maybe not in the poke you with a stick or steal your pencil kind of way, but in a way that can still hurt our feelings. They try to bring us down, criticize us, knock down our dreams. We can't just take it, and we certainly cannot believe them. By letting them affect us, we are just handing over the power to them. We are in control of our situations and have the ability to make or break that situation. We can't keep focused on what other people think of us- instead, we have to focus on what we think of oursevles.

I guess what I'm saying is this: don't take it when other people bring you down. Ignore them and know your worth. Do not focus your entire life on trying to please everyone around you. I heard once that everyone has a song in them- their dna. Find your song. Own it. Know who you are, and be confident in that. Find your dreams and chase after them- for you, not for anyone else.

Day 24- The Person That Gave You Your Greatest Memory

Dear Alex, JP, Sara, Mo, and Dave:
August 16th, 2008. The beautiful wedding of Maureen and Dave. One of the greatest nights of my life. I shall never forget that night. The dancing, confessions, no big deal, and, of course, how absolutley stunning Maureen looked and how happy I was to officialy welcome Dave as my brother. JP and Sara, I am so happy for you and look forward to your special day. Alex and I will be ready to protest the hustle and dance during the "couples dance". I love you all, my beautiful family.
<3, Megan

Day 25- The Person That Is Going Through A Hard Time

Dear Martha-
You are an incredible woman with a beautiful family. I am here for you and I am praying. My hand is here whenever you need a squeeze of encouragement. I am here for you.

"I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind.
Some come from ahead and some come from behind.
But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see.
Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!"
~ Dr. Seuss

Love, Megan

Sunday, July 25, 2010

fly away and see the world changeless

These days I'm experiencing one of the strangest situations I've ever faced:

Every friend I've made this year, besides Dean, is moving away at the end of the week. We were all placed here through our different volunteer organizations, and now that the year is over, everyone is scattered across the country. I've never had this happen before. I've given so much of myself to each of these amazing people, and now the reality is that I will most likely never see them again. I mean, I'd love to, and I will certainly make the effort, but if I'm being honest, I know that things happen and it is very likely I won't see them. How odd. I am really going to miss all of these people.

Lately I've been finding words of comfort regarding this transition through music. Today, a line from "the Truth" by Kris Allen hit me-

"stop pretending that it's not ending, and let the end begin".

I know Kris is likely discussing a relationship ending here, but the message to me was another reminder to let go. It's time for this year to come to a close, as sad as that may be, and to move onto the next adventure in my life. Time for a new beginning, once again. The theme of my 20's, I think.

I'd like to sum up my feelings toward the absolutley incredible people I've met this year through a song. I hope and pray that each of you find peace and happiness in your new journey, and that you find a "home". I hope nothing but the absolute best for each of you, because trust me, you deserve it. Thank you for everything you've taught me and for your service to the city and to God. I love you and will always be here for you. If you ever find yourselves back in Detroit, give me a call.

Day 21- Someone You Judged By Their First Impression

Dear Dave, Katie, and Nate-
I think we've all discussed our impressions of each other based on facebook before we actually met. It's funny, because none of you are what I expected- and you have each left an amazing impact on my heart. I love you dearly and I am going to miss you. I am very grateful we've become such good friends. Thank you for everything.
Love, Megan

Day 22- Someone You Want To Give A Second Chance To

I don't really have anyone that this applies to. I haven't had any issues lately where people need a second chance, and there are people who I have given second chances to and they blew it...completly.

Day 23- Last Person You Hugged

Dear Sam,
Thank you so much for coming to my little birthday celebration last night. I had fun at our "sleepover". "I'll even sleep on the little couch!". HA. You're a great friend and I really appreciate you driving 3 hours just to spend some time with me. It meant so much! Love you!
Love, Megan

Thursday, July 22, 2010

won't stop me from getting where I'm bound

Remember how my last blog I talked about how I don't do well with idle time and it was really getting to me? Yes well. My life has made a complete 360 since then. I've been babysitting for six beautiful children, ages 1-12. It's fun, but whooooooo buddy is it work! Thankfully my mom is really close, and is extremely close to the family, so she came to help me today. As hard as it is, I also really look forward to the bright playing "Apples to Apples Junior Edition" with the three youngest girls, one of them sitting on my lap because she can't read yet and needed my help. Or little baby Caroline (named after my mom!) smiling and just wanting a little love.

I came across a few quotes today that really hit home.

1. Let loose of what you can't control. Serenity will be yours.

That's always been hard for me, but something I'm trying really hard to do, especially when it comes to this whole job situation. I can't control what happens, all I can do is put on my brave face, be honest with myself, and say a prayer. What's meant to be will pave it's way, and when it does, I will be at peace. In the meantime, I just need to take some deep breaths. I got this.

2. How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.

THAT captures what I've been feeling about saying goodbye to my kids and my community members. I am so blessed to have it and it should be a good sign that saying goodbye is so hard. I mean when I left college, I was scared as all heck for the future, but not sad at all about actually leaving, because my experience was 70% negative.

Alright, letter meme.

Day 18- The Person You Wish You Could Be.

Dear Melinda,
You amaze me. Everywhere you go, you touch lives, inspire, motivate...just by a few simple words or through song. I wish I could be more like you, someone so open and welcoming to every single person you meet. Someone honest, patient, kind, and understanding. You have the biggest heart of anyone I know, and an amazing sense of humor to match. You have this aura of trust around you. People feel like they can just tell you anything- which is probably A LOT to handle at times, but you do it with a smile and one of those famous Melinda hugs. I think that you and I have a lot in common as far as our shyness goes, but the difference is, I look to you for motivation and inspiration, I look to you for words of comfort and advice. You have helped me so much...and what really amazes me are the number of people who feel the same about you that I do. I'm so proud of you, Mama. Words will never do you justice. Just know that I pray I can be just 1/2 the person you are.
Love, Meggie Banana

I know you don't like listening to your own songs, but it's appropriate here :)

Day 19- Someone that Pesters Your Mind- Good or Bad

No one pesters my mind except my own anxieties. And I don't feel like writing to them for the public to see. So, no.

Day 20- The One That Broke Your Heart The Hardest

Dear You-
Ugh. You've gotten too much spotlight on here lately. I don't have anything else to say. Peace.
-Megan- (PS, it was EXACTLY two years ago that I fell head over heels for you. Funny.)

Monday, July 19, 2010

give a little

"Music is the universal language. Without it, I truly think humans would not survive. Melody and rhythm don’t discriminate either; so it doesn’t matter if you’re a homeless man in the city or Oprah-the right music can make the heart feel alive like nothing else in this world."- Nick Thomas, lead singer of The Spill Canvas.

I read that in an interview with Nick yesterday, ironically just as I was settling down to write a blog that answers the question "What inspires you".

My answer? Music. Nick's words summed it up better than I could ever possibly say. (He's kind of good with words, HA). Not a day goes by when I do not turn on my ipod, radio, pandora, cd, etc without finding inspiration in music. Sometimes it's through the instrumental aspect, but usually it's through words, since my other inspiration is writing. I love analyzing lyrics and finding a song that perfectly fits my mood or situation. I don't know where I would be without music, it keeps me going.

The past two days I have been such a lazy bum. I mean, I kind of needed's the first two full days off I've had in a while. But at the same time, I'm reminded of how poorly I do emotionally with "idle time". I have gotten myself into many webs of anxiety over this whole finding a job situation, and my mood has been brought down about 500 notches. I'm hoping this changes when I start babysitting the Carter's this week...and that I find a job soon so that this does not become a daily occurrence.

One of the things I did accomplish these past two days was finish reading "Up The Down Staircase". Someone suggested I read it way back in the beginning of the year, but I just got around to it. I was already familiar with the story because I was on stage crew for the play in high school, but reading it after what I did this year at Cristo Rey was a much different experience. Here is the description from Amazon:

Never before has a novel so compellingly laid bare the inner workings of a metropolitan high school. Up the Down Staircase is the funny and touching story of a committed, idealistic teacher whose dash with school bureaucracy is a timeless lesson for students, teachers, parents--anyone concerned about public education. Bel Kaufman lets her characters speak for themselves through memos, letters, directives from the principal, comments by students, notes between teachers, and papers from desk drawers and wastebaskets, evoking a vivid picture of teachers fighting the good fight against all that stands in the way of good teaching.

Reading it felt like someone took some of my stories from my year of teaching creative writing and put it in this book. I would recommend it to anyone, but specifically first year teachers...especially if you are teaching in an "urban" high school. Amazing book and I'm really glad I read it. I felt Miss Barret's passion for wanting to reach out to her students, and frustration when she felt like there was a wall that was not coming down. I felt the discouragement of parental involvement and administrative support, and laughed at the assignments the kids turned in.

Day 16- Someone Not In Your State/Country

Well this could be many people for me, but I'm going with my cousin Pat.

Dear Patrick,
I love you. You inspire me and I am so proud of you. I envy your strength and am constantly amazed by you. You are the best dad ever and your kids are very blessed to have such a strong helping hand every single day. I hope that I am able to come down to TN and spend time with you. Thank you for being a reminder of what it means to love fully. You are incredible. Keep on keeping on and know that I am praying for you.
Love, Megan

Day 17- Someone From Your Childhood
Dear Amy,
I think childhood and I instantly think of you. I could start listing off memories, but we'd be here all night...I just really cherish the memories of riding my bike to your house every day and playing all kinds of games. We really had some amazing imaginations, didn't we? I miss those days, when everything was easy and our biggest problem was deciding what kind of kool aid to drink. We spent every day together...many family dinners, birthday parties, backyard sports, etc. I can't even remember what we talked about, I just remember always being happy with you. As we grew older, we drifted, as to be expected, but I never stopped thinking about you or the good times we had. I'm so proud of you. You'll always be one of my best friends...and whenever you need to eat graham crackers with frosting and talk, I'm here. I love you always.
Love, Megan...Mary Kate :)

PS- I'm in the process of redoing my blog, so be on the lookout. Right now I'm just having fun making new headers.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

you can always come home

I'm trying really hard to keep my heavy eyes from closing and collapsing ontop of my desk right now. I think that's a sign of a good weekend. Scratch that...I know I had an amazing weekend. I knew it would be exhausting, since I was the hostess for two parties- 5 year high school reunion and Sara (my soon to be sister in law)'s bridal shower. But, I was so full of love and smiles, I don't even care that I can barely move.

Since Thursday was my last day at work, I left my house in Detroit early on Friday to help my mom with a few projects and to set up my sister's house for the shower. I didn't get much sleep that night, but powered through to get most everything finished. I had a good time shopping, cooking, and cleaning with my sister. It was fun to have such a special "project" with her.

After a day of setting up, I headed to Dick O Dow's for our 5 year high school reunion. I have to admit- I was terrfied. I planned the event, and although it was laid back and not extremly difficult to plan, I was so scared it was going to flop. It turned out to be a really fun night, though. We had a decent turnout and I had some great conversations with people. I was a little bummed that some of my closest friends couldn't attend, but in a way it was good because I was sort of forced (I'm not sure that's the right word...) to talk to other people I normally wouldn't have. I got connected with a few people who are interested in the work I'm doing in Detroit and want to get involved themselves, so that was cool. Also fun to share "crazy college stories". Overall, it was a good night and I'm looking forward to the 10 year reunion :)

When I got home, I was greeted by my brother and his fiancee Sara. So excited to see them, since it's only every few months that it happens. We all went to sleep pretty shortly after I got home. Saturday morning woke up and headed to my sister's house for the shower. The shower was so that our family could celebrate, since the couple lives in Indiana, as does Sara's family. I was SO excited to my family members- especially those I never see. It was evident how full of love and joy everyone in that house was Saturday. I was happy to be by Sara's side most of the day and watch the interaction between her and my family. We played games, ate delicious food, opened presents, and chatted. I'm hoping to go visit one of my aunts up north soon, and looking forward to seeing everyone else again at the wedding. Shower was perfect- everything I was hoping for.

After the shower, my sister, mom, Sara, and myself shot over to my parents house to grab our clothes and my dog, because the boys were going to be there for the bachelor party. We ran all around the house to get our stuff just as they were all coming back from playing boccee ball. I was happy to see so many family/friends there to support my brother. We ran out of there after literally throwing Seamus in the car (he was too scared to jump in). We headed back to my sister's house, where we were joined by two of my sister's friends whose husbands were at the bachelor party. we lounged around, ordered pizza, talked for hours and watched Leap Year. Throughout the movie, we kept getting texts/calls from the boys telling us the party was wrapping up and we could come back if we wanted- but we wanted to finish our movie and time together! My mom, Sara, and I finally headed back around 12:30. When we got there, it was just my brother, his friend Mark, and my dad left sitting on the patio. Sara and I joined them for a few final drink and exchange of stories about our days (whose do you think were just a little crazier?) and then everyone headed to bed. I was seriously just so ecstatic and grateful that my brother and Sara had a good time at their parties- they deserve it.

This morning I woke up and laid in my mommy's bed talking with her for a while and then discovered that Spill Canvas, my FAVORITE BAND EVER was doing a meet and greet just minutes from my parents house. I knew they were in town but didn't have tickets to see their show because they are opening for Goo Goo Dolls and tickets are SUPER expensive. So, I sat around with Alex, JP, and Sara, ate some delicious Olga's, and then packed up the car. Made a stop at the meet and greet at Caribou. I was ready to walk in, get a drink, and then mosey over to their table. HOWEVER, when I walked in, they were all walking directly towards me, drinks in their hand, headed for front table. Nick Thomas, my musical hero, was directly in front of me. I've met him once before but this was way different. He asked if I was here for them and I was all excited and said "YES!". haha. So I had them sign my poster, shook all their hands, and then they asked if I was coming to the show. I said that I wasn't and I was sad because it was the first time I've ever missed a show, that I even went to the shows before they were somewhat famous and it was just Nick and his guitar. Nick got all sad and then gave me a hug and said "I'm sorry, Pooh Bear!". I looked at him weird and he was like "since you've known us so long you deserve a pet name". The rest of the band got pulled away from me by another girl, but I was fine with that, ha. Before Nick had a chance to walk away I said "you are a genius. Thank you for all your lyrics. You inspired me to write. You have no idea how grateful I am for your music. It's been part of me since I was 13. It's my heart." He smiled and said "that's kickass. Keep writing...I want to hear one of your songs on the radio one day". Then he gave me another hug. I AM AN IDIOT and did not charge my camera, so I didn't get a picture...but I'm happy with my poster and conversation :) It was very surreal. There I was, talking to the guy who comes through my speakers every single day with words that are my core. I love them so much and will ALWAYS be a fan. Always.

So, I'm a few days behind on this letter thing, huh? Here we go.

day 12 - the person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
I don't hate you, but you did cause me an enormous amount of pain. You pretty much ruined my entire sophomore year of college. I'll never forgive you for that. Things could have been so different. Better. Now I look back on that year with anxiety and hate, and it's your fault.

day 13 - someone you wish could forgive you
Hi Girls-
I'm not sure what happened between us, but suddenly it felt like it was all five of you against me. I'm not sure if it's something I did, but that is what I have been told....if it is, I'm sorry. I spent the best years of my life with you and don't want whatever mess we got ourselves into to ruin those memories. I'm proud of all of you and hope that you are happy, wherever you are. I'll always love you and hope you can forgive me and accept the mistakes I made.
Love, Megan

day 14 - someone you’ve drifted away from
To Everyone I've drifted from-
Life happens and I'm sorry if you think I'm ignoring you. Know that all I have to do is hear a song, see a movie, hear a word, and I think of some of you- and smile. Call me, let's chat. I'd love to hear what you are doing.

day 15 — the person you miss the most
Dear Grandma and Grandpa (both sides)-
I wish you were here. I miss you all so much. You left us too soon. I know you've been watching over me since you passed, but I wish you could be here so I could see your beautiful faces and hug you. Thank you for raising my parents to be such amazing people. Thank you for always taking care of us. I miss you and I love you very much. Take care of Laurence for me.
Love, Megan

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

I'll Be With You In Your Dreams

I am so happy right now. All week I've been under the impression that the four of us were going to do something tonight for Nate's last night- cook dinner, go out to eat, something. So imagine my surprise when I'm sitting in our front room with Katie and Nate, wondering why we weren't picking a place to go, when my parents walk in the front door. Surprise! My roommates planned it so that Dave and Nate would be able to celebrate my birthday with me since they will be moving out before then...and also because last year, orientation was just 2 days after my birthday, so they've never celebrated a birthday with me. How SWEET are they? We went to Sweetwater Tavern and came home to a funfetti cake that Katie had made last night(I was told she was making it for someone at her work). Then some of our friends came over. Such a good time. It really meant a lot to me that Dave and Nate cared that much. I have the best community and parents ever :)

On an even cheesier note, I wrote something last night that is ridiculously obnxious and cheesy...but also true. It is in regards to transition...because if anyone knows me, they know I struggle with transition.

I'm terrified that this year is being yanked away from me. It's like...this year has brought me so much peace and happiness, it hardly seems fair that it's just going to be GONE like that. I feel like I'm right at the top of a roller coaster- fingers grasping so tightly to the safety bar, clutching my eyes shut so tight so that i don't have to see what's ahead. Any second now, I'm going to drop right into my new adventure- which will be scary at first, my stomach might drop. It will have it's ups and downs and throw me for a loop. Then the ride will stop, and I'll get on the next one. Life is like just keeps moving onto new adventures, new highs and lows. You kow that feeling on a roller coaster, once you get past the fear, and you just Life should be like that...hold on tight during the challenges, but be able to let go and feel free.

If you got threw that without puking, I award you with 5 points.

day 11 - a deceased person you wish you could talk to

Dear Laurence,
I miss you so much it hurts. I always looked forward to your facebook notes and emails about your mission and stance on world poverty. It's just so unfair. I don't know if I'll ever understand why you had to go...but I am so amazed and proud of the mark you left on this world. If I could be just 1/2 the person you were, I'd be happy. Please help me, my little buddy. Help me to continue to live your mission. I need you to show me the way and to take my hand. I want to help, I want the world to know your name- not for the fame, but so that everyone else can stop living so selfishly and learn to give a litte love. That's all you did, day in and day out. You lived the Gospel through your words and actions...and all before the age of 16. I sometimes imagine you up in Heaven, talking with all the other angels about our wolrd and how you can help it. I picture you coming down to Earth and gently touching people on the shoulder. I know that might seem crazy...but I know you are with us. I want to help you, Laurence. I love you with my whole heart and would like to give you the biggest hug ever. Thank you for being more than an inspiration, more than an "amazing person"- you are a saint, hands down. No one will ever convince me otherwise. I love you, buddy. Just show me the way.

Love, Megan

At 5:45 into this video is the dedication by Bono to Laurence at the Rose Bowl concert; almost 6 weeks after he met Laurence in Chicago.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

I'll leave nothing less than something that says I was here

These past few weeks have been all about goodbyes. I've said goodbye to the kids and most of the Sister's of Mercy, this week I have to say goodbye to one of my community members and all of my cowokers. It's tough. I just spent a year pouring my heart and soul into this experience and now it's over....and I will probably never see most of these people again.

Last night the four of us gathered for our last spirituality night. I've looked forward to our Monday evening's together all year. They have been a time of peace, understanding, and support as each of us grow further in our spiritual journey. Last night we went to dinner at Le Petit Zinc, a little French cafe by our house that we have been wanting to try all year. Then we shared a brief reflection on the year, took a "family photo" and made tshirts (MVC IN THE D!). I just love those kids. I shared this with them last night as part of my reflection (and yes, I know this is starting to get repetative).

. I’m also taking away three best friends. …. One of my biggest anxieties coming into the experience was community life, because I have suffered many “bad roommate situations”. I’m also a very shy and anxious person, so it takes me a while to get used to new people. However, you guys made it so easy. You opened your arms, hearts, and ears to me. You quickly became my best friends, in a sort of deep friendship I’ve never had before. You’ve each left an incredible impact on my life…to quote from Wicked, “It well may be That we will never meet again In this lifetime So let me say before we part So much of me Is made of what I learned from you You'll be with me Like a handprint on my heart And now whatever way our stories end I know you have re-written mine By being my friend...”.

Now that everything is wrapping up, it's time to look ahead to the future. I have no idea what it hold for me, which is both exciting and terrifying. Sometimes I go into a spiral of anxiety and worry when thinking about mind starts racing with thoughts of no job, no money, no car, no community members supporting me, etc. When I start getting anxious, I am reminded of my favorite bible verse, Jer 29:11. For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” I know that I will be taken care of. It's just hard to focus on that right now.

This week should be pretty busy. Nate will leave us on Thursday. I'm going to miss the heck out of that boy! He is so much like my older brother it's insane (and drives me insane sometimes). I love it, though, because it feels more like home. I am so proud of Nate and know that he is going to be on hell of a doctor. Good luck in New York City, buddy. I promise I'll visit.

Day 9- Someone I Wish I Could Meet.

Dear Oprah,
We could change the world, you and I. I've got big ideas, you've got DA POWER. Even though I'm still totally mad at you for never responding when my friends made the BEST VIDEO EVER and sent it to you, I do admire you. One day I will meet you...we'll talk about my book and Laurence and orphanages in Africa. Thank you for all that you do. Let me know when you want to have lunch.

Love, Megan

Day 10-Someone You Don't Talk To As Much As You'd Like To

Dear Sarah, Jamie, and Lindsay-
Of all my friends that I don't talk with regularly, you three are the ones I miss the most. You pretty much ARE my childhood/adolesence. I look back on the times we've shared with nothing but smiles. Everything was always just so easy with you three...even though it made me sad when Jamie and Lindsay fought (remember when I wrote you that note?). Our trips up north, watching NICK GAS, ponce tournaments, concerts, dance parties, sleepovers, etc are so important to me. What I love the most about the three of you is that I know if I ever needed anything, I could call you up and you'd be there, no questions asked...and I hope you know I'd do the same for you. I love you guys so much. I'm so proud of each of you and the mark you are making on this world. You all inspire me, day in and out, even though we don't talk often. Thank you for the beautiful friendship. I am blessed to have each of you in my life. Can we PLEASE have a lovefest soon?
ALL MY LOVE, Meggers. Megaroni. Meggie. Pops. Lil Jon. Donut hater.

I think it's only appropriate that I assign this song to you girls...

Sunday, July 11, 2010

that's what i'm here for

For my birthday last year, I set up a cause on Facebook to raise $200 for Malaria No More. I raised every penny through the donations of friends and family. This year, I'm trying to raise $100. Reason being, I know everyone is really tight with money and I don't want to beg. This year, I'm not only doing it to save lives, but in memory of Laurence, my inspiration. That kid had so much compassion and motivation, so many amazing creative ideas. I want to do everything I can to continue his mission. This is one small thing that I can do.

So, if you would like to donate (I'm suggesting $10, but feel free to donate more or less), click here.

In other news, we had our official goodbye party yesterday. Because everyone has been so gracious to us this year, we wanted to have our own party. We (and by we, I mean Katie), made all the food, cleaned the house, and invited Sisters, friends, family, coworkers, and neighbors. It was great to have conversations and goodbyes with such amazing people. The party ended somewhat early and we just kind of hung out, watching Jurassic Park.

Today we all walked to Church together for the last time. I must say, that has been one of the best parts of this year for me. I've never had friends I could share a deep faith with, and it means the world to me that we can go to Church together and then have a sit down brunch afterwords. I'm really going to miss that.

Anyways, still have a few more weeks before it's really I won't get into TOO much sappy stuff tonight. That will probably be tomorrow, after our last spirituality night (warning you now).

Letter to the last person you had feelings for...

Dear Loser,
I COULD just quote lyrics to you. "I would never wish bad things, but I don't wish you well". You are probably the most frustrating person I have ever met in my entire life. What I hate the most about you is the way you decieved me...and you knew just what you were doing. "I had a feeling that those looks you gave me were real...what if I ripped your heart apart at the seams maybe then you'd know how I feel". I really don't want to waste any more time talking about you so I'm not even going to get into everything. I'll probably never see you again, and I'm okay with that. OH- and thanks A LOT FOR RUINING SO MANY SONGS FOR ME. Goodbye.

Megan...from Michigan.

As much as I'd love to post a really angry "I'm over you so oh well" song, this one really...hits home.

Letter to an internet friend.

I don't have many internet friends. I don't count the backups because I've met 98% of them (and most of them several times). I am going to write this to Elizabeth, an Idol fan who I've never met.

Dear Elizabeth-
You are so sweet! I love reading your blog because you have such an open heart. I absolutley LOVE your music taste and your dedication to the arists you support. It breaks my heart that you have to deal with icky stuff sometimes, because you deserve so much happiness....but even though you go through a lot, you are always very positive toward everyone! I love that! Your tweets crack me up and I adore your graphics. Thank you so much for being a positive light in my life. Keep your head up girl and keep working hard. I'm so proud of you!!! I'm always here for you if you need anything.

Love, Megan

Friday, July 9, 2010

I just came to say goodbye love

I've had my heart broken. I've had broken friendships. I've had to say goodbye to people close to me.

But none of that comes close to the feelings I had today saying goodbye to my kids. It was my last real day with them. I said goodbye to the first crop three weeks ago, which was hard enough, but today came the tears. After school, we all met in the gym so they could get their report cards. One by one, they stood up, got their report card, and shook hands with all the teachers. I was the only one of the teachers standing up there who won't be returing next year, and the kids new that. So many of them, as they approached me to shake my hand, instead looked at me with these big watery eyes and reached out for a hug. A few of them gasped "I'm going to miss you". The ones I don't know as well reached for a hand shake and smiled as they said "thanks, Miss Carolin". Ironically, the last student called is the one I am closest to. When she got to me she just let out this cry and with her head on my shoulder let the tears roll down. That pretty much broke me. I've put 11 months of hard work, listening, and compassion into these kids. To see them each one by one leave me like that was so depressing. I know I will never see some of them again. I will think about them for the rest of my life, and for the amazing year they gave me. I wish they knew just how much they meant to me. That was definatley the hardest goodbye I've ever had to do. Ever. It hurts, you guys. It hurts big time.

So, it's over. I still have a week of work but let's be honest, I won't be doing anything valuable except paperwork. It's really over. I only have a week left with my community as well, before everyone goes their seperate ways. This is just so sad! I mean, I know it has to end, and I've accepted that, but can't I just adopt all those kids? Please?

Day 6- Letter to A Stranger

Dear Stranger-
Maybe someone I don't know stumbled on this blog. I hope that your day is going so well for you. Don't let anyone bring you down- be strong, dream big, work hard, love yourself, love God, love others. Sometimes I wonder what strangers think of me upon reading my blog or even seeing me on the street. I guess it doesn't matter, though. I'm happy with who I am. I hope you're happy. Truly happy. If not, how can I help? Smile. You're beautiful.

Love, Megan

Thursday, July 8, 2010

I'm not there yet, but I will be.

So, I saw Eclipse...and I liked it. (Sung to the tune of "Kissed A Girl" by Katy Perry).

I had kind of a rough day. Michigan has hit record highs this week, high 90's with a large helping of humidity. It's miserable outside...but even worse inside, with no air conditioning. I can't escape it, because our house is boiling and the school is about 10x worse. Today I was in near dramatic as that sounds, just try to imagine what this has been like...for five days I have slept for MAYBE two hours a night. Last night I legit had a fever because I was so hot. I wake up, go to a school with no ac and hot sweaty kids who are almost finished with summer school and therefore CRAZY. So I left work, headed to an appt and thinking I was going to see Eclipse...I decided I needed some me time and wanted to spend it in an air conditioned movie theatre :)

I had a little...bump in the road...for my plans, but all is okay now. Just had a very stressful hour or two when our car's battery light came on. All is well now, but the stress of phone calls, the heat, money, etc really took a lot out of me. My hands were shaking and I felt sick. To make a long story short, I'm at my parents house right now, and going to pick up the car in the morning. It's actually kind of nice being here, because for once in five days I may get some sleep!

Anyways, Eclipse. I def needed to see it today after my stress. I'm not a big Twilight fan...and by that I mean this: I read the books, I enjoyed them, and see the movies for pure entertainment reasons. I do not "want to find my Edward" or obsess over it. Eclipse really surprised me. The first two movies were major dissapointments, but this was actually pretty solid. I'm glad I saw it...and actually understood Edward a little bit. I'm very curious as to how Breaking Dawn will play out.

Tomorrow is my last day with my kids. Ever. I went through this once when I said goodbye to the kids who weren't going to summer school, now this is for real. I'm a little worried about it. There's one in particular I am not ready to leave. Wish me luck.

Speaking of luck...

Day 5.

Dear Dreams,
Hello, lovelies. I used to be scared of you. Petrified, actually. Scared that I would let you down, scared that other people would laugh. Scared that I would fail. Then, someone came in my life who taught me that dreams are reachable, that they are possible. She said "dream bigger than you've ever dreamed before because this has taught me that it's all possible". From that day forward, I've been proud of my dreams. I've openly discussed them, set small goals and made to do lists. There are so many of you, but I don't lose track. None of them are "small" or "unimportant". You are all so important and you keep me going every single day. I think of the word dreams and I just smile. I'm working so hard to make you into reality. You and I could change the world, together. I'm proud of my dreams. Dreams, don't ever give up on me, please. I won't give up on you. I'll keep working hard...and if I slip, just give me a little nudge and remind me that you are there, that you are reachable. See you soon, little guys. <3, Megan

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

we get to carry each other- letter to siblings

I'm writing two letters for this day. I know, cheating. Scandal. One is for my blood siblings, the second is for my adopted little sisters.

Dear Siblings,
Well, here we are, three social workers. Who would have thunk? Back when we were kids, everyone predicted JP as a stand up comedian, Mo as a journalist, and me as a teacher or a nurse. Now we're out there, lending a helping hand and a listening ear. I'm proud of all three of us, but would not have made my own life choices had it not been for the example the two of you set.

Obviously, almost all of my childoohd memories involve you two...watching Nick, playing Sega, Maureen dishing out macaroni and cheese "one scoop for YOU, two scoop for ME", road trips to Florida, backyard sports, etc. I am lucky that I can look back and see such positive memories, not only because of our parents, but because I had such amazing siblings. Of course, we've had our bumps along the way, but we've held on tight and have a special bond holding us together. I am incredibly grateful for that bond and for the support the two of you have shown me in everything I do. You may not understand my "American Idol thing" but you still support me and smile through my stories. That means the world to me.

Both of you made the decision to go into fields where you can help people, and that inspired me to do the same. I know how stressful your jobs are, but you both seem to genuinly love what you are doing, and that is something that keeps me going. I am incredibly proud of you and the impact you make on the world every day- I am confident that you touch lives because you have touched mine. Thank you.

On a final note, I am so very happy that both of you have found love- true love. You deserve it. Dave and Sara are both very lucky to have such amazing people.

I love you both dearly. Thank you for everything. You mean the world to me.
Love, Megan

To my sweet little sisters-
I don't mean to ignore the boys that have become little brothers to me this year, but there is something that needs to be said about all my girls. You know, coming into this year I was terrfied. I had no idea what to expect, and was prepared for the worst. What I got, though, was a year that I will never forget. I owe that to you. You immediatley put your trust in me and opened your hearts. On the first day of school I had girls approaching me with their journals, asking me to read their poem. I also had to break up a fight in the girls bathroom, but we can brush aside that small detail :) But overwhelmed me with your sense of welcoming and trust! Over the year I have gotten to know most of you very well. Some of you I even call out to saying "hey little sis!". I have loved that. I've loved hearing your stories, hearing your troubles and sitting down to help you fix them. I love the notes you give me in between classes, asking for help because you "heard I was good at that" (you'd be shocked how many I get!). I especially loved all the times you made me laugh, particularly when you could tell I was having a bad day. You opened your hearts to me, but also learned my heart- and knew exactly how to help me out!

Girls, as much as I love you, you frustrate me so much sometimes. I see you chase after the boys who probably aren't the best for you...not to say they aren't good people, but they aren't ready for a real, in the end, you may end up getting hurt. That's the last thing I want to see. The thing is, you just keep doing it...over and over. A boy could be SO hurtful toward you, yet the second he gives you one of those looks, you're back flirting with him again. You'll learn eventually that you can't do that. It's not healthy. You are all beautiful, strong, smart young women who deserve THE BEST. So if you're not getting that, if you're not happy, then back away. Move on. Also, don't surround yourself with friends who are going to get you into trouble. Make the best choices for you. You all have amazing potential, you just have to try a little harder to reach it.

I'm going to miss you girls. Thank you again for giving me the best year of my life. I promise to come back and visit next year, and I will be thinking of you and praying for you. Smile, dream big, and work hard. Never give up, because I'll come back and kick you. Hard. The song below is one I hope you all listen to.

God Bless, Miss Carolin

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

you raise me up

I spent my 4th of July the best way I could imagine- surrounded by an amazing community of women who made it all possible for me to have the best year ever. The Detroit Sisters of Mercy, who fund the Mercy Volunteer Corps, have gone above and beyond to make sure the four of us were taken care of this year. Whether we were sick, needed a personal retreat, hungry, bored, had car problems, whatever, they were always there with us, with open arms and prayers.

We spent the day at McCauley center on Sunday. First for Mass, then a goodbye service for the four of us, and ended the day with a picnic. The service was absolutley perfect. They invited the four of us to speak briefly about our year. This is pretty much what I said...cannot remember my exact words.

"I could write a book on all of the things I've learned this year, but today I think I can narrow it down to three. First of all, to be able to reconnect with Mercy has been a true blessing. I went to Mercy High School and had an amazing experience, went away to college and really missed it. I knew that I wanted to be able to come back to Mercy somehow. MVC has given me that opportunity, and seeing the amazing things the Sisters do every day inspires me. I am very grateful for their support and prayers and know we wouldn't have made it through without them. Secondly, working at Cristo Rey has been amazing. I have never worked with high school kids before, so when I found out I was going to be counseling them, I was a little nervous. I love those kids. Their stories touched my heart. I know each of them by name and each story. I will never forget them. They helped give me the best year of my life. Lastly, my wonderful community members. They have become my three best friends, and will probably be three of the best friends I'll ever have. It was so great to be able to pray together, cry together, support each other through this experience. I want to thank them for their support and love and wish them all the best".

It's funny, because those words do not even begin to express how grateful I am, how much I've learned, what touched my heart. I don't know if I ever will be able to explain it. I just know that this year was probably the best year of my life, despite the little bumps along the way...and even though I am unaware of my future, I'm excited about it, because I'm taking with me a whole new perspective.

That would be a perfect place to end this blog, but I cannot skip out on my letters meme, especially since I missed it yesterday.

Dear Crush,
Well, right now you are nonexistant. Actually, you probably do exist somewhere, I just haven't met you. I hate the word "crush" anyways. I'm not 13 years old anymore. Anyways, you must be out there somewhere. I'll keep my eyes open but my heart protected, because I've been hurt. Let's hope you are different than all the rest.

Cheers, Megan.

Dear parents,

You are my whole world. I cannot ever thank you enough for the support, compassion, understanding, patience, and grace. One of the things I have learned this year is just how lucky I am to have such amazing people guiding my way. You've never let me down, and are always there to pick me back up if I fall. You are so incredibly generous. Knowing that it's okay that I don't have a job yet and that you are going to welcome me back into your home with open arms means the world to me. You guys know and understand me more than anyone else in this world, but you love me for it. You have unconditional love for me, JP, and Maureen, and I have never once doubted that. You know how to make me laugh, you know when I am worried, you know what to do if I'm angry. You know what I love, you know what makes me sick, you know absolutley everything. Even the little things, like making me salmon when everyone else is having burgers because I don't eat meat. Also, part of my experience this year has been especially wonderful because of your support. Offering your home to us on these hot days, lending the bikes, allowing me to use mom's car, picking me up on the side of 94 when my car broke down...all of those were incredible acts of kindness. I thank God every single day for blessing me with such amazing parents. I love you both from the bottom of my heart. See you Saturday. :)

Thank you, Meggie

Sunday, July 4, 2010

soundtrack of my life part 4, letter to sam

This is the fourth and final (for now ) edition to the soundtrack of my life. This one goes from summer 2008 right up to the present. I know I'm leaving things out, this is just what stuck out the most. Enjoy :)

Ages 19-22

1. One Step At A Time- Jordin Speeeeeeeeezy. Sam and I saw Jordin summer 2008, went backstage and cried with her about Amanda and Laurence being sick. It was very powerful and this song always reminds me of that day.
2. Angels- David Archuleta. Amanda passed away June 2008. This was her song, and soon became our (and by our, I mean Sam and I) song that summer. Amanda was with us through those experiences.
2. Please Don't Stop The Music-Rihanna. Except, the American Idol Season 7 version.
3. Listen- Syesha Mercado. For obvious reasons, if you know anything about me and that summer.
4. Apple Bottom Jeans-T Pain. I wish I could list every song that was played at my sister's wedding, because each of them are filled with a memory of Alex and I on the dance floor. However, this one is particularly memorable because not only did it play at the wedding, but also at the dive bar afterward...such good times with Alex, my brother, and my future sister in law.
5. Don't Want To Miss A Thing-Aerosmith. My sister and Dave's song :) They got married this summer!
6. Love Don't Live Here- Lady Antebellum
7. The Climb- Miley Cyrus. Because I have fond memories of screaming that song with Lauren.
8. No Air- Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown. I mean, have you SEEN Alex and I remake this music video?
9. Light On- David Cook
10. Crush- David Archuleta
11. Heartless- Kanye West
12. Gives You Hell- All American Rejects
13. It's Your Love- Melinda Doolittle. So proud of this lady :)
14. Just Dance- Lady GaGa. First single!
15. I'm Yours- Jason Mraz Never once got sick of this song.
16. Closer- Ne Yo
17. Single Ladies- Beyonce
18. So What- Pink
19. More Than Anyone- Gavin DeGraw
20. Gravity- Sara Barailles
21. For Good- Melinda and Gina :)
22. Home- Melinda Doolittle. Her performance of this song gives me CHILLS.
23. My Life Would Suck Without You- Kelly Clarkson
24. My Deliverer- Mandisa. Mandisa came into my life in a BIG way fall 2008 and has not left ever since. So thankful for everything she has done for me.
25. I Will Be- Melinda Doolittle
26. Waking Up in Vegas- Katy Perry
27. Slow Ride- Adam Lambert/Allison Iraheta
28. All I Ever Wanted- Kelly Clarkson. I met Kelly for the first time fall 2009!
29. Battlefield- Jordin Sparks.
30. Forever and Always- Taylor Swift
31. I Got A Feelin- Black Eyed Peas.
32. Run To You- Lady Antebellum
33. Bad Romance- Lady Gaga
34. Glass- Gavin DeGraw
35. New Begnnings- Ayiesha Woods
36. All Hail The Heartbreaker- The Spill Canvas
37. Live Like We're Dying- Kris Allen
38. Walk On- U2 RIP Laurence Carolin <3<3<3

Funny thing is, there are SO many more that I could put on here for these past few years, but I think that's enough :)

Also, I'm doing a letters meme.

day 1 - your best friend
i have a couple of ~best friends, but i'm only picking one for this one.

dear sam,

I always have a hard time putting our friendship into, I've told you all of this before. So forgive me for being repetative...but last night, after I got that text from you about you know what, I kind of just...crumpled onto my floor and started crying. What got me through, tho, was knowing how much fun you were probably having at the Idol concert. I just imagined you boppin around singing along and cheering for all the idols and that got me back up. I was reminded of our earliest days as friends, when we stalked season 6. I really miss those carefree and down for adventure we were. It amazes and inspired me that you are still like that- always down to have fun, but never selfish- you'll just do whatever everyone else wants to do. Anyways, since the days of running into Phil Stacey in a dark parking lot, we've been best friends. Through roomates, break ups, nights out, dance parties, tears, hugs, music, and laugther, we have had one hell of a friendship. You know more about me than any of my other friends, but you love me anyways. That is such a gift to me, thank you! You're one of the only people I can completely trust. It's hard to find a friend who I can be my complete self around, but with you I don't even have to think about it- it just happens. thank you so much for your strong, beautiful presence in my life. I really do not know what I would have done if you had not come into my life. I am very blessed.

love you,

Saturday, July 3, 2010

Soundtrack of My Life, Part 3.

If I thought my early teen years were hard, my late teens are 10 times more difficult. I went through drastic changes between the ages of 15-19. Many family challenges, beginning of college, new friends and with that a new set of values, and then, toward the end, a change in me that I am forever grateful for. Come on this musical ride with me and take a look into the mind of Megan, from ages 15-19. Some have no explanation, others come with a long story.

Ages 15-19 (2004-2007)

1. The Remedy- Jason Mraz
2. Yeah- Usher. I knew the whole dance to this song. Jealous?
3. My Boo- Usher/Alicia Keys.
4. My Happy Ending- Avril Lavigne
5. She Will Be Loved- Maroon 5. I used to listen to this song on repeat, hoping a boy would sing it to me one day.
6. Hollaback Girl- Gwen Stefani. This $%$^ is bananas!
7. Collide- Howie Day
9. I'll Be- Edwin Mccain. My all time favorite song, and one that I played before I gave a talk on retreat my senior year of hs.
10. Away From The Sun- 3 Doors Down. The other song I chose for my retreat talk because I had gone through a very hard time.
11. The Hero Dies In This One- The Ataris. This song really hit home. I was dealing with some family issues my last 2 years of high school and the words were sooo true to my life.
8. Seasons of Love- Rent. This song came into my life prior to 2005, but it particularly took meaning when I graduated from high school. Rent was like OUR thing back in that year. It defined my group of friends. As we were leaving each other to move onto college, those words struck my heart in a big way.
9. Since U Been Gone- Kelly Clarkson. I went back to my high school for a dance and everyone was singing this to me as a joke.
10. The World I Know- Collective Soul. This song most def represents Delta Gamma.
11. Sexyback- Justin Timberlake. Fond memories of frat parties at the end of my freshmen year of college.
12. How To Save A Life- The Fray
13. 7x7- Brand New. During a really rough sophomore year, this song was preciscly how I felt about friends who betrayed me...and my hate/anger toward them and myself came through as well.
14. LGFUAD- Motion City Soundtrack. Yes, the actual words to this song are "lets get fucked up and die". No, I never want to go back to the place where this song was my anthem.
15. There Will Come A Day- Melinda Doolittle. Thank the dear sweet Lord, Melinda came in right when I needed her and this song saved me.
16. Peace and Love- Blessid Union of Souls. When Delta Gamma closed its doors, this song is the one that expressed that emotion.
17. Changeless-Carbon Leaf. Another song about DG closing.
18. Sober- Kelly Clarkson. Kelly's album came out almost exactly three months after I stopped using alcohol as a numbing effect. The first song I heard was Sober. I bawled my eyes out.
15. Livin On A Prayer- Bon Jovi. Fond memories of American Idol Season 6 tour.
17. Tattoo- Jordin Sparks. Her very first single. I remember how excited Sam and I were that Blordin happened in the video. I was so proud of this girl, and still am!
18. Breath Anotha- Blake Lewis. Putting this on here because if it had not been for Blake and Sam's love for him, we would not have become bff's.
19. Gravity- John Mayer
20. No One- Alicia Keys
21. Teardrops on My Guitar- Taylor Swift. Her first hit single!

I think I'll end there. Next up will be ages 19-22. :)

Friday, July 2, 2010

Soundtrack of My Life, Part 2. 30 tracks.

Here is where things become a bit more early teen years. Breaking away from what was "cool" and sort of doing my own thing. Also the years of school dances, all night slumber parties, high school sports, driving around with my friends who had their license. All of these events included different types music, a song that triggers a memory. I miss these days, and looking back on these songs is a blast back to my young mind.

Ages 10-15 (1998-2003)
1. My Heart Will Go On- Celine Dion. A terrific song from one of the greatest movies of the 90's, Titanic.
2. Genie In A Bottle- Christina Aguleria.
3. Baby One More Time- Britney Spears
4. Summergirls- LFO. This was my first celeb encounter! It was my friends birthday, so the radio dj hosting their concert let us backstage. I don't remember anything about it other than standing there and smiling.
5. Only God Knows Why- Kid Rock. Previous to this song, I had only associated Kid Rock with trashy songs. Then I heard this, and I was amazed.
6. Aaron's Party- Aaron Carter. Dude. I LOVED him.
7. Jumpin Jumpin- Destiny's Child. MMMHMM.
8. All The Small Things- Blink 182. I thought I was all punk rock, listening to Blink.
9. Proud To Be an American-Lee Greenwood. September 11, 2001. I was 14, sitting in my health class.
10. With Arms Wide Open- Creed. This song was played at my grandma's wake.
11. I Will Survive- Gloria Gaynor. Mercy girl anthem...allowing with the next few songs:
12. American Pie
13. Brown Eyed Girl
14. Time Warp- Rocky Horror Picture Show
15. Respect- Aretha Franklin
16. Lady Marmalade- Moulin Rouge. Obsessed with that movie when it first came out!
17. Hero- Enrique Iglasis
18. Fallin- Alicia Keys. The first time I realized what neo soul music was.
19. My Friends Over You- New Found Glory
20. I Feel So- Boxcar Racer
21. A Moment Like This- Kelly Clarkson. Her winning moment on American Idol. Look how far she's come!
22. Complicated- Avril Lavigne. I don't even care, I loved this girl and her first album.
23. Lose Yourself- Eminem. DEEEEEEETROIT.
24. Hazard to Myself- Pink. Teenage angst.
25. Hey Ya- Outkast. Fond memories of shaking it like a polaroid picture.
26. Get Low- Lil Jon
27. Beautiful- Christina Aguleria
28. So Yesterday- Hilary Duff
29. Wonderwall- Oasis
30. So Yesterday- Hilary Duff. My best friend was obsessed with Hil Duff.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Soundtrack of My Life, Part 1.

So, I decided to complete one of my 43 things- create the soundtrack of my life. I wasn't sure how I should go about it..pick popular songs from every year? Pick songs that mean a lot to me? I did a little bit of both. I wrote down signficant life events that have a song attached to them, also picked songs from the radio, movies, and albums that, at that time in my life, were very important to me for whatever reason. Some songs were released earlier, but came around in my life later (example, Living On A Prayer was one of my 2008 anthems, but was released in the 80's.)

I did it in parts, because as I got older, music became more important to me. You'll notice that my younger years don't have many songs...and that's because, while I'd love to sit here and tell you that I clearly remember running around my house singing Michael Jackson songs, I am not going to lie to you...I have no memory of music in my life until I was about 9 or the songs I picked for my young years are the ones that stand out the most, many of them are from movies. Today, I present to you, the soundtrack of my life...from 1988-1997.

Ages 1-5 (1988-1992)
1. Somewhere Over The Rainbow~Wizard of Oz
2. Part Of Your World~Little Mermaid
3. Beauty and The Beast~Beauty and The Beast. Still to this day one of my favorite songs!
4. Tomorrow~Annie
5. Wind Beneath My Wings~Bette Midler. I don't remember when exactly it was, but sometime we had a service for my grandparents anniversay and this song was played. I was probably older than 5, but I just remember being very little and loving the words to this song.
Ages 5-10 (1992-1997)
6. 500 Miles- The Proclaimers. I remember hearing this on the radio all the time!
7. Waterfalls- TLC
8. Macarena
9. You've Got A Friend In Me- Toy Story. Favorite Pixar movie!
10. Wannabe- Spice Girls. I got this CD for Easter the year it was released and completly flipped out.
11. I Believe I Can Fly- Space Jams. Cmon. everyone loved this song.-backstreet’s back (1997)
12. Who Will Save Your Soul- Jewel. I remember hearing this song on the radio on one of our roadtrip to Ft Walton Beach, FL and thinking that I had never heard anyone sing that way before.
13. Walking On The Sun- SmashMouth. Another radio hit.
14. Don't Speak- No Doubt. Like Jewel, I was really impressed with this song.
13. Barbie Girl- Aqua. Memories of field trips to the roller skating rink!
14. MMMbop- Hanson. Every 10 year old girl's anthem in 1997.
15. Tearin Up My Heart- Nsync. Nsync was totally my first concert!
16. Backstreet's Back- BSB. I was an Nsycn girl, but will admit I loved this song.

Hope you enjoyed going back into time with me! Tomorrow I will begin my teen years, ages 10-15. What fun!