Monday, June 15, 2009

10 people- With A TWIST!

I need to get a lot off my chest. So I'm doing that 10 people meme again. This time I'm adding songs for some people...because music can express more than I can.

10 things you want to say to people but can't. Don't put their names.

Just an FYI- these aren't all necessarily things I can't say..they may just be things I should say more often.

1) I know that you are one of the most amazing people in the world, and the incredible impact that you have on people’s lives. I also know that you don’t think I appreciate you. If you ONLY knew how much I appreciate, love, and care about you. I would do absolutely anything for you, despite what you think. No, I don’t understand the pain and confusion you live with on a daily basis, but I do understand how hard it is and how much you have overcome. I LOVE you. Don’t you ever forget that.

2) Being friends with you have been one of the most stressful, yet rewarding experiences of my life. I cannot think of two more opposite people, yet somehow we make it work. I can go from worshipping you to being so very frustrated with you within minutes. I’m pretty sure you feel the same way about me. I love you, and I am so grateful for everything you’ve done for me- but sometimes I am hurt by your actions and words. I really hate feeling uncomfortable because I don’t know what you’re going to say next…maybe I’m too sensitive, but I just don’t enjoy feeling attacked. I also feel like you worry too much about what others think of you and try too hard.

3) Every time I try to put into words what I feel for you, I end up deleting it. I have not felt this way about anyone in a very long time. No one knows what it’s like and that I am completely serious abut this. Much like someone else on this list, “you and I” will NEVER happen. It’s pretty much impossible. What started off as something so small turned into me falling head over heels for you…and while some may say that I am to blame for this little mess I got myself into, I never expected you to give me the attention that you have. So no, I do not blame myself. I wish I didn’t feel this way about you, but I do. It’s one of the most frustrating feelings in the world, to have this much passion for someone who could easily forget about me. Almost every song I hear reminds me of you, it’s you I dream about…may seem sad and pathetic to some people but I know my heart and this is real for me. It’s not for you, and it probably never will be. I said to someone else that I am learning to accept they will never see me the way I see them, but with you I don’t know if I can ever accept it. It’s not that you don’t care about me, or that you’ve hurt me…..I just know that nothing will ever come of this. That hurts me more, knowing that I will continue to sit here and think about you, while you’re off somewhere else, not even caring about me (as you shouldn’t, you have no reason to). Okay this has turned into one rambling mess. I don’t know how to put this into words. One of these days I’m going to climb a mountain and when I get to the top I’m going to yell “I LOVE __________”.

Okay, I have about a MILLION songs that could describe the above person, but I settled for Elliot Yamin- change the "she's" to "he's"

4)Through all the relationships that I have had, I don’t think anyone has cared for me as much as you have. It scares me because I don’t know how I feel about you…I don’t want to lead you on anymore, but I need your constant comfort and concern that you show me. I think I’m just lonely…and therefore “needed” the attention you give me. I can’t keep on hurting you, though. You deserve someone so much better than me. I’m so sorry.

5) You are making the biggest mistake of your lives and have pushed everyone else away because of it. I really hope you wake up soon and realize how many people you are hurting. The way you treated people is absolutely disgusting.

6)I think by now you know how much you mean to me, but it never gets old. Especially today, I’ve been thinking lately just what an amazing person you are. Everyone who meets you just loves you because of your shining, bright, friendly personality and the way you put everyone else before yourself. More people should know about you and how amazing you are- because really, you are the one who inspires so many of us to be good people. I love you and don’t know how I got so lucky to have you in my life, but I am very blessed.

7)I shouldn’t, but I can’t help but feel completely uncomfortable whenever I am around you. It kills me, because we should have such a strong relationship…there really is no reason for there not to be. However, lately you’ve changed, and I’m not so sure I like it. Never thought you would be the kind of person who would let other peoples thoughts influence your own. You’re so much stronger than that. I don’t think you realize it, but you’re hurting people. Another part of the problem is that I can’t stand knowing that I will never be you. As ridiculous as that sounds, it’s something that I deal with every day of my life.

8)You know I really don’t think you understand just how badly you hurt me. You can try to put the blame on me all you want, you can try to make me feel guilty, but we both know that is just more of your little game. Everything that has gone down the past few months just makes me realize how corrupted I was by you and your lies. I never should have let myself become that person, but it happened. It makes me really wonder if I wasted my time being so close to you. You’ve done nothing but bring me down and make my problems worse, unfortunately I realized this too late. The damage has been done. As hard as you try, nothing is going to piece this mess back together. Sorry. I spent too many nights crying about you and wondering what I did wrong. I don’t need that in my life. I’m going to let you go continue living this life that you are so proud of…to quote my favorite band, “I hate to break this to you, but being a coward is not a legitimate career”. One day you’ll learn. Until then, enjoy.

9) You will always be the love of my life, no matter what. Things have been rocky lately but we have been through worse. I can’t help but keep the dream of us in the back of my mind, even though it will probably never happen. I don’t know if you’ll ever, ever see that we belong together, but it’s becoming easier to accept. I will always be here for you, no matter what. When I think of happiness, I think of you. Do not EVER let anyone hold you back from living your life the way you want to. That’s all I have to say about that.

Another one that I have at least 184392183 songs for. Can't go wrong with Taylor Swift, tho :)

I don’t think that you are aware of just how much you have helped me over the past few months. I wish that we were able to spend more time together, but I am so thankful for all the guidance you’ve given me. The funny thing about this is, you’ll probably read this…and have no idea that I am talking about you. You are one of the most amazing people that I have known, and quite an inspiration for me. We’re a lot alike, and I look at how far you’ve come and how much you have accomplished as a sign of hope for me. I love youuu!!


Sammie said... Add Reply

2. You make me cry.

That is all.

Anonymous said... Add Reply

boo to the haters!