I've had my heart broken. I've had broken friendships. I've had to say goodbye to people close to me.
But none of that comes close to the feelings I had today saying goodbye to my kids. It was my last real day with them. I said goodbye to the first crop three weeks ago, which was hard enough, but today came the tears. After school, we all met in the gym so they could get their report cards. One by one, they stood up, got their report card, and shook hands with all the teachers. I was the only one of the teachers standing up there who won't be returing next year, and the kids new that. So many of them, as they approached me to shake my hand, instead looked at me with these big watery eyes and reached out for a hug. A few of them gasped "I'm going to miss you". The ones I don't know as well reached for a hand shake and smiled as they said "thanks, Miss Carolin". Ironically, the last student called is the one I am closest to. When she got to me she just let out this cry and with her head on my shoulder let the tears roll down. That pretty much broke me. I've put 11 months of hard work, listening, and compassion into these kids. To see them each one by one leave me like that was so depressing. I know I will never see some of them again. I will think about them for the rest of my life, and for the amazing year they gave me. I wish they knew just how much they meant to me. That was definatley the hardest goodbye I've ever had to do. Ever. It hurts, you guys. It hurts big time.
So, it's over. I still have a week of work but let's be honest, I won't be doing anything valuable except paperwork. It's really over. I only have a week left with my community as well, before everyone goes their seperate ways. This is just so sad! I mean, I know it has to end, and I've accepted that, but can't I just adopt all those kids? Please?
Day 6- Letter to A Stranger
Maybe someone I don't know stumbled on this blog. I hope that your day is going so well for you. Don't let anyone bring you down- be strong, dream big, work hard, love yourself, love God, love others. Sometimes I wonder what strangers think of me upon reading my blog or even seeing me on the street. I guess it doesn't matter, though. I'm happy with who I am. I hope you're happy. Truly happy. If not, how can I help? Smile. You're beautiful.