Quiet

I'm a quiet person. I always have been. I talked about this a little in my "L" post when I touched on "listening", how I spent so much of my childhood not speaking and just listening. I'm still pretty quiet. Once I get to know you, I can talk your ear off, but it takes me a little bit. The exception to this is when I'm very passionate about a subject. During one of my first few weeks at my old job, one of my old co-workers said "So, do you ever talk or...". I hadn't noticed I wasn't speaking up as much, it just seemed normal to me. I didn't know these people, why bore them with my life story. And the thing is? Most of the time it's not that I'm nervous or don't want to talk. It's that I don't know what to say, or I think people don't care what I have to say. I have had to sort of push myself and remind myself of my worth, and that what I say does matter. It's an ongoing process.

Different from my personal quiet attitude, I enjoy my quiet time in general. I mentioned yesterday I have little patience and have problems being completly still. But there are moments where I so need my quiet. I need to take a step back from everything going on and just enjoy the peace. Last year, I went on a silent retreat, by myself, for three days. Did I get bored? Kind of. But it was so necessary for me to just recharge my batteries. I didn't speak to anyone, I just sat and wrote in my journal or prayed. It was a beautiful experience. I really recommend to everyone to spend at least 5 minutes in silence, every day. Turn off computers, tv, music, and just BE. You might surprise yourself.

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