I went to Church today. I won't lie to you, it had been a while since I sat through a Catholic Mass. I went through a bit of a questioning period this past summer where i was trying out other faiths.
But then my dad was diagnosed with cancer, and somehow I was drawn back to St.Hugo. Maybe that makes me a bad Catholic or even selfish. But in the last few weeks I have been reminded that St. Hugo is home. And I want to be home. Plus, I feel a desire stronger than ever to be closer to God.
During the homily, the priest said "grateful people are happy. Ungrateful people cannot be happy".
I thought about this for the rest of Mass. I am not always grateful. I try to be, but sometimes I let negativity win and I forget how to be grateful. It's easier to be negative and to feel hopeless. I know those feelings well. And sometimes I let them take over. I whine and complain and push away all the good things, pretending not to see them. I full on convince myself that life sucks and it's never going to get any better.
But those are lies. Life is hard, and it throw really strange and difficulty things at you, but there's still a glimmer of hope and there's still beauty. There is always something beautiful happening, even when things seem to be falling apart.
I'm going to try my best to look for the beautiful things. I can't promise I will be 100% successful. I can't tell you I'll hop on here every day and list every beautiful thing that happened that day. But I can promise that I will try. I'll look for them, and be grateful. Because grateful people are happy and I want to be happy.
Right now, in my seat, I see a few beautiful things. I see my best friend on the couch next to me, letting me watch the Tigers even though she doesn't really care. I see a house that I have lived in for almost two years. I see a cat who I pretend to hate but actually love. I see the Tigers winning 1-0. I see a lot of beautiful things. And I am grateful for them.
Have a good week everyone. Find the beauty.