I don't usually write these kinds of blogs but I was having a conversation with my best friend Alicia the other day about dating and relationships, and finding the "right" guy. I don't really consider myself picky, but I'm also not settling. So here...here is what I am looking for in a man.
You are intelligent. You have a college degree and a good, solid job that does not involve folding clothes or flipping burgers. You are not in debt (save for your rent, mortgage and/or car payments) and pay your current bills on time. I know, that may sound snobby. But goals and working hard to accomplish them are very important to me.
You have a strong relationship with God. My future man does not have to be Catholic, but he has to believe in God and be able to be open about faith and spirituality.
You are a family person. You love yours and will be anxious to fit right in with mine. You don't have kids right now, but are open to the idea of one day having adorable little babies. You like kids.
You do not smoke or do drugs. Blech.
You are not materialistic. You don't need the latest trend, gadget, whatever in order to feel better about yourself.
You listen well, you laugh often, and you know how to make me laugh. You are honest about your emotions. You own up to your mistakes. You're a kid at heart and believe in magic and romance. You treat all people with respect. You are not racist, homophobic, nor do you portray any form of hate on a certain "type" of person.
You are gentle but strong. You inspire me. You're creative and worldly. You have quirks to you that make you interesting.
You have a hobby or something that you are passionate about. You like to travel, see new things, meet new people.
You may look like a lumberjack.
You love me for who I am. You don't care that I go from an indie rock band to Janis Joplin to Kelly Clarkson on my Ipod. You don't make fun of me for watching American Idol. You understand that I am shy, and you help me feel more comfortable. You give me that knowing look when we run into someone we don't like so much.
So...where is he?
Friday, December 30, 2011
Monday, December 26, 2011
2012 goals
I get really excited about the new year celebration. I love saying goodbye to a year of memories and then starting fresh. I, like probably most people, always sound like a broken record with resolutions & things i’m going to change & this year is no different. .My goals for 2012 are simple. I thought long and hard about these, about things that are reachable goals that I can actually do, and follow up on my progress.
1. Take one picture every day. (I tried this once and failed. Would like to try again).
2. Do 5 5k's before 2013. (anyone want to join me?)
3. Cook/bake more foods
4. Read a book a week
5. Write, every day, even if it is short. Finish my book for Laurence. Attempt to write one new poem/song lyrics every week. (To keep myself accountable for the cooking, reading, and writing, I will attempt to blog at the end of each week an update on what I accomplished that week.)
6. Lose weight. I say this a lot, I fail. But I'm going to work very hard at it. I'd like to be at my goal weight a year from now. I'm going to keep track of what I eat and blog every Wednesday, title it "weigh in Wednesday". I need a ton of support in this.
7. Break shyness/fear. Do one thing each day that scares me.
What are your goals? Will you help me with mine?
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
2011 moments and tweets
It's that time of year, time to reflect on the blessings/highlights of 2010-2011.
**Cricket, Cricket**
Okay okay, there were some great moments. Usually this blog entry takes two entries because it is so full. Not so much this year, but that's okay. Because I am very proud of where I am right now.
So here, my friends, are some of my favorite moments of the year....in no particular order.
Getting Close to my mom's class. Last year, I was working part time and picking up odd babysitting jobs while searching for a full time position. I worked afternoons-evenings, so most of my days were free. And I spent a lot of them in my mom's classroom, helping with different projects. Those kids were probably the most obnxious class she's ever had, but I adored them...probably because they gave me a distraction. They gave me something to laugh about. And yes, they were little boogers, but they prayed for me to find a job, daily. They asked everytime I came in if I had found a job yet. I enjoyed them a lot. And now, I've been able to get to know the 11-12 class as well. Now they are cutie pies, and all so sweet and loving little creatures.
Writing. I feel like I wrote more in 2011 than I ever have in my life. I wrote more poetry, song lyrics...I did a huge blog challenge in April that forced me to really pull and reflect. I read a lot more, took more trips to the library. I wrote letters to people during Lent. Oh, yeah, and there's that book I'm writing about Laurence's life.
1/2 marathon I have no words for that experience (that's a lie because I wrote a really long entry about it after). But now, months later, I can't tell you how that felt. I've kind of lost that moment. Which I hate. The medal on my door is just a little reminder. I thought that looking at it every day would keep me motiviated, it hasn't. Maybe it will now. Maybe I can focus on that. Let's try. That weekend was special. It was the only time during that whole "finding a job" situation where I was able to really get away. I accomplished a huge feat. I got over a fear. I became stronger.
Babysitting. I had four semi regular babysitting gigs in the beginning of 2011. Overnight sitting for Claire and John when their mom had to take trips. I learned a heck of a lot about myself and patience during those trips. Those two are great, great kids. Then there were the Jarrell's who I spent my mornings with to get them off to school. I so enjoyed talking with them before they filed onto the school bus. Talk about maturity and grace and strength, those kids had it. Then there was the little baby boy who I "babysat" (and still do) most Saturday evenings. He's always in bed when I get there-always. So I just sit on the couch. He gives me a much needed break from life. I just sit there, watch a movie or read, with absolutley no interruptions. And then, of course, there are the always adorable Owie and Anna. Anna was 5, Owen 3. I loved spending my spring days with them! We played barbies, watched Dora, made mac and cheese, colored, drove to various activities. We had a blast, the three of us.
cleveland weekend
indy birthday weekend. I had so much fun in Indy with my brother and sister in law. It was very chill, but necessary,and,as always, a great gift to be able to spend time with them.
dave/katies wedding. Aah! That weekend was so perfect. I mean everything about it. I got to spend time with the greatest dude in the world, Dean Machine. I was reunited with my dear hearts Meghan and Jason. And, of course, the main event, I was honored to be a part of a ceremony that united two of my best friends, Dave and Katie. I had seen them go from strangers to friends to lovers, so to watch them celebrate that and the genuine love they have for each other was a true honor and blessing. <3
anne/jesses wedding. Such a fun night with old friends. One of the best weddings I have ever attended. I loved how much of Anne and Jesse I saw in the ceremony and reception. I loved how perfect their story is. And I loved feeling like I was in high school all over again.
tutoring at cristo rey: I was lucky that Cristo Rey allowed me to come back and tutor for a few weeks while I was on the job hunt. It was only for a very short time but it allowed me to reconnect with some of the kids and, in a way, bring closure to my whole year with MVC. I saw that they were being taken care of and that I could move on.
bhgh\quitting bhgh. Big Brother Boys Club Little Sisters Girls Hope was quite an...exeprience. It was the worst job I've ever had. Not because of the kids, but administration was so awful that it LITERALLY made me physically sick. But, I am grateful that I met Alethea. Even though we only keep in touch via text once in a while, she is one of the greatest people I know and I was dang proud to call her a co worker and friend. She has a heart unlike anyone I've known. It's a shame they couldn't see that. I'm also grateful for the kids. I don't (and can't) talk to them anymore, but I think of them every single day. I wonder how they are doing and pray that they are happy and healthy. I'm also thankful to myself for learning that sometimes you have to do what you have to do. I didn't want to quit a job, I'm not a quitter. But I HAD to. There was no fixing that place. So yes, I am grateful that when I had a 104 degree fever and they told me I had to come into work, that I said "no.".
lupus walk
idol concert. Is it weird that I can't really remember details of the Idol concert? Maybe I had heat stroke. I just remember we had a good time, and our seats were very close to the stage. I remember bits and pieces from being outside like seeing Stefano and Haley in a taxi but everything else is kind of a blur. But, I do remember saying that it was one of the best Idol concerts I had been too- so I must have had a good time :-D
tigers game. I am forever thankful to the Tigers game for bringing me closer to Maggie and Tierra. I remember thinking on the drive down that it was going to be a disasted...and it kind of us...as were the events that followed the following week (company lay offs). But we still managed to have a good time, and came out of it becoming accomplices, and now friends.
cleveland weekend. OMG. Best weekend ever. Sometimes I cannot believe our luck that weekend. I got to see my number one Idol and inspiration, Melinda, sharing a stage with legends. I got to spend time with two amazing backups. I got to hug my Mama Melinda for the first time in years. Then I got to spend time with three my lovely fwands, Desi, Sam, and Brenna. I got to see Gavin live and fall in love with his music again. I saw Cook perform songs from an outstanding album. And I got to thank them for all they did for me.
getting the job. This job has been tough. It's been a learning experience, it's been a test of patience. It's been a whole new set of challenges, every single day. And it exhausts me. BUT, I have never been so proud of myself in a job. I feel like I am creating something, making it my own. It's a fight, and I work hard. But I get a lot back. I get to see smiles on the faces of volunteers when they feel they made a difference. I get staff who are supportive of the program and me and who encourage me to keep on going. I have made some new, wonderful friends...but most of all, I have just seen the beauty of human interaction, the impact we can make on each other when we put everything aside and just listen.
favorite tweets of the year
JordinSparks:Watching the Discovery channel right now & I had no idea jellyfish were so gangster.
lizZmilK: @Zammie255 oh fuxk I forgot where I lived lol
elliotyamin: Haha!.well nobody wanna hear bout how dirty yo swift is!RT@thedirtyswift: @elliottyamin hey man nobody wants to hear about your "instrument"
Kanye West: I could never do stand up cause I tell jokes better when I'm sitting
DavidArchie: Nothing like getting creamed in basketball by your mom lol.
mdoolittle: Changed my hair a bit...love it, but just walked by the mirror in my hotel & screamed cuz I thought someone else was in my room. #embarrased
kelly_clarkson: Recently found out that Easter falls on my birthday this year .....Jesus is totally stealing my thunder!
lizZmilK: I am a machine that turns alcohol into dancing.
Georgehuff4real: SANG CHILDREN!!!!!!!!!!!
BrunoMars:I shall pelvic thrust extremely hard in honor of all my critics in the audience tonight.. I hope they're on birth control.
DavidArchie: Can't wait for Cars 2. Pixar never lets me down.
GTLauren:I owe my ability to meeting people I've seen in concert to @Zammie255 and @mcaro05
ramielemalubay It's definitely too hot for pants
CaseyAbrams: A Very cool person Named Megan gave me an Esperanza Spalding Vinal. Chamber Music Society, AMAZING! Thanks Megan, means a lot :)
mdoolittle: Really excited! Finished all my "hoework"...think I'll take a quick nap. :-)
mandisaofficial What? NBC has a show called "American Ninja Warriors" & I've nvr heard of it? How is that possible? I LOVE American Ninja Warriors! #sarcasm
jambajim: To the Taylor Swift fans who just saw a half-naked @jambajim changing in my hotel room, I THOUGHT THE BLINDS WERE CLOSED DON'T CALL THE COPS
kelly_clarkson: Found the puppy poo!! Thank you God!
Toddyrockstar Just realized that I don't have a favorite color :( Guess I better start making some serious decisions
aaronspears Am I the only person who tweets sometimes while dropping chalupas??? I'm curious... #ipromiseimnotdoingitnow #toilettweeting
SaraBareilles I haven't said much today. Although I did eat a yogurt. And some string cheese. So me and dairy are talking.
Zammie255:@mcaro05 listening to whatta man by salt n pepa and it reminds me of you for some reason....... I have no idea why.
zammie255 @lizZmilK I'm singing Adele and sleeping
BrunoMars Theres an owl outside that wont shut up!! Let me sleep you spooky fuckin owl!!!!
CaseyAbrams does any one wanna come and scratch my scalp?
mdoolittle That dang T-Mobile commercial! For some reason, I KNOW they're saying walking in a 4G wonderland, but I never hear the "f" in four!
jessyjams adam levine is about to line these broads up for a different play date for each day of the week
TheFray Overheard backstage tonight: "there's only one wine opener here. And Kelly Clarkson has it." -is
**Cricket, Cricket**
Okay okay, there were some great moments. Usually this blog entry takes two entries because it is so full. Not so much this year, but that's okay. Because I am very proud of where I am right now.
So here, my friends, are some of my favorite moments of the year....in no particular order.
Getting Close to my mom's class. Last year, I was working part time and picking up odd babysitting jobs while searching for a full time position. I worked afternoons-evenings, so most of my days were free. And I spent a lot of them in my mom's classroom, helping with different projects. Those kids were probably the most obnxious class she's ever had, but I adored them...probably because they gave me a distraction. They gave me something to laugh about. And yes, they were little boogers, but they prayed for me to find a job, daily. They asked everytime I came in if I had found a job yet. I enjoyed them a lot. And now, I've been able to get to know the 11-12 class as well. Now they are cutie pies, and all so sweet and loving little creatures.
Writing. I feel like I wrote more in 2011 than I ever have in my life. I wrote more poetry, song lyrics...I did a huge blog challenge in April that forced me to really pull and reflect. I read a lot more, took more trips to the library. I wrote letters to people during Lent. Oh, yeah, and there's that book I'm writing about Laurence's life.
1/2 marathon I have no words for that experience (that's a lie because I wrote a really long entry about it after). But now, months later, I can't tell you how that felt. I've kind of lost that moment. Which I hate. The medal on my door is just a little reminder. I thought that looking at it every day would keep me motiviated, it hasn't. Maybe it will now. Maybe I can focus on that. Let's try. That weekend was special. It was the only time during that whole "finding a job" situation where I was able to really get away. I accomplished a huge feat. I got over a fear. I became stronger.
Babysitting. I had four semi regular babysitting gigs in the beginning of 2011. Overnight sitting for Claire and John when their mom had to take trips. I learned a heck of a lot about myself and patience during those trips. Those two are great, great kids. Then there were the Jarrell's who I spent my mornings with to get them off to school. I so enjoyed talking with them before they filed onto the school bus. Talk about maturity and grace and strength, those kids had it. Then there was the little baby boy who I "babysat" (and still do) most Saturday evenings. He's always in bed when I get there-always. So I just sit on the couch. He gives me a much needed break from life. I just sit there, watch a movie or read, with absolutley no interruptions. And then, of course, there are the always adorable Owie and Anna. Anna was 5, Owen 3. I loved spending my spring days with them! We played barbies, watched Dora, made mac and cheese, colored, drove to various activities. We had a blast, the three of us.
cleveland weekend
indy birthday weekend. I had so much fun in Indy with my brother and sister in law. It was very chill, but necessary,and,as always, a great gift to be able to spend time with them.
dave/katies wedding. Aah! That weekend was so perfect. I mean everything about it. I got to spend time with the greatest dude in the world, Dean Machine. I was reunited with my dear hearts Meghan and Jason. And, of course, the main event, I was honored to be a part of a ceremony that united two of my best friends, Dave and Katie. I had seen them go from strangers to friends to lovers, so to watch them celebrate that and the genuine love they have for each other was a true honor and blessing. <3
anne/jesses wedding. Such a fun night with old friends. One of the best weddings I have ever attended. I loved how much of Anne and Jesse I saw in the ceremony and reception. I loved how perfect their story is. And I loved feeling like I was in high school all over again.
tutoring at cristo rey: I was lucky that Cristo Rey allowed me to come back and tutor for a few weeks while I was on the job hunt. It was only for a very short time but it allowed me to reconnect with some of the kids and, in a way, bring closure to my whole year with MVC. I saw that they were being taken care of and that I could move on.
bhgh\quitting bhgh. Big Brother Boys Club Little Sisters Girls Hope was quite an...exeprience. It was the worst job I've ever had. Not because of the kids, but administration was so awful that it LITERALLY made me physically sick. But, I am grateful that I met Alethea. Even though we only keep in touch via text once in a while, she is one of the greatest people I know and I was dang proud to call her a co worker and friend. She has a heart unlike anyone I've known. It's a shame they couldn't see that. I'm also grateful for the kids. I don't (and can't) talk to them anymore, but I think of them every single day. I wonder how they are doing and pray that they are happy and healthy. I'm also thankful to myself for learning that sometimes you have to do what you have to do. I didn't want to quit a job, I'm not a quitter. But I HAD to. There was no fixing that place. So yes, I am grateful that when I had a 104 degree fever and they told me I had to come into work, that I said "no.".
lupus walk
idol concert. Is it weird that I can't really remember details of the Idol concert? Maybe I had heat stroke. I just remember we had a good time, and our seats were very close to the stage. I remember bits and pieces from being outside like seeing Stefano and Haley in a taxi but everything else is kind of a blur. But, I do remember saying that it was one of the best Idol concerts I had been too- so I must have had a good time :-D
tigers game. I am forever thankful to the Tigers game for bringing me closer to Maggie and Tierra. I remember thinking on the drive down that it was going to be a disasted...and it kind of us...as were the events that followed the following week (company lay offs). But we still managed to have a good time, and came out of it becoming accomplices, and now friends.
cleveland weekend. OMG. Best weekend ever. Sometimes I cannot believe our luck that weekend. I got to see my number one Idol and inspiration, Melinda, sharing a stage with legends. I got to spend time with two amazing backups. I got to hug my Mama Melinda for the first time in years. Then I got to spend time with three my lovely fwands, Desi, Sam, and Brenna. I got to see Gavin live and fall in love with his music again. I saw Cook perform songs from an outstanding album. And I got to thank them for all they did for me.
getting the job. This job has been tough. It's been a learning experience, it's been a test of patience. It's been a whole new set of challenges, every single day. And it exhausts me. BUT, I have never been so proud of myself in a job. I feel like I am creating something, making it my own. It's a fight, and I work hard. But I get a lot back. I get to see smiles on the faces of volunteers when they feel they made a difference. I get staff who are supportive of the program and me and who encourage me to keep on going. I have made some new, wonderful friends...but most of all, I have just seen the beauty of human interaction, the impact we can make on each other when we put everything aside and just listen.
favorite tweets of the year
JordinSparks:Watching the Discovery channel right now & I had no idea jellyfish were so gangster.
lizZmilK: @Zammie255 oh fuxk I forgot where I lived lol
elliotyamin: Haha!.well nobody wanna hear bout how dirty yo swift is!RT@thedirtyswift: @elliottyamin hey man nobody wants to hear about your "instrument"
Kanye West: I could never do stand up cause I tell jokes better when I'm sitting
DavidArchie: Nothing like getting creamed in basketball by your mom lol.
mdoolittle: Changed my hair a bit...love it, but just walked by the mirror in my hotel & screamed cuz I thought someone else was in my room. #embarrased
kelly_clarkson: Recently found out that Easter falls on my birthday this year .....Jesus is totally stealing my thunder!
lizZmilK: I am a machine that turns alcohol into dancing.
Georgehuff4real: SANG CHILDREN!!!!!!!!!!!
BrunoMars:I shall pelvic thrust extremely hard in honor of all my critics in the audience tonight.. I hope they're on birth control.
DavidArchie: Can't wait for Cars 2. Pixar never lets me down.
GTLauren:I owe my ability to meeting people I've seen in concert to @Zammie255 and @mcaro05
ramielemalubay It's definitely too hot for pants
CaseyAbrams: A Very cool person Named Megan gave me an Esperanza Spalding Vinal. Chamber Music Society, AMAZING! Thanks Megan, means a lot :)
mdoolittle: Really excited! Finished all my "hoework"...think I'll take a quick nap. :-)
mandisaofficial What? NBC has a show called "American Ninja Warriors" & I've nvr heard of it? How is that possible? I LOVE American Ninja Warriors! #sarcasm
jambajim: To the Taylor Swift fans who just saw a half-naked @jambajim changing in my hotel room, I THOUGHT THE BLINDS WERE CLOSED DON'T CALL THE COPS
kelly_clarkson: Found the puppy poo!! Thank you God!
Toddyrockstar Just realized that I don't have a favorite color :( Guess I better start making some serious decisions
aaronspears Am I the only person who tweets sometimes while dropping chalupas??? I'm curious... #ipromiseimnotdoingitnow #toilettweeting
SaraBareilles I haven't said much today. Although I did eat a yogurt. And some string cheese. So me and dairy are talking.
Zammie255:@mcaro05 listening to whatta man by salt n pepa and it reminds me of you for some reason....... I have no idea why.
zammie255 @lizZmilK I'm singing Adele and sleeping
BrunoMars Theres an owl outside that wont shut up!! Let me sleep you spooky fuckin owl!!!!
CaseyAbrams does any one wanna come and scratch my scalp?
mdoolittle That dang T-Mobile commercial! For some reason, I KNOW they're saying walking in a 4G wonderland, but I never hear the "f" in four!
jessyjams adam levine is about to line these broads up for a different play date for each day of the week
TheFray Overheard backstage tonight: "there's only one wine opener here. And Kelly Clarkson has it." -is
Friday, December 16, 2011
2011 in Entertainment
Top 10 Albums
10) Florence and the Machine- Ceremonials
9) Mandisa- What If We Were Real
8) Jack's Mannequin- People and Things
7) NeedtoBreathe- The Reckoning
6) David Cook- This Loud Morning
5) Kate Voegele-Gravity Happens
4) Gavin DeGraw- Sweeter
3) Lady Antebellum- Own The Night
2) Kelly Clarkson- Stronger
1) Adele- 21
10 Favorite Singles (Some albums were not released in 11, but these singles were)
Just so you know, this list originally had 50 songs on it. I made myself cut it to 15.
15. Headlines- Drake
14. Not Over You- Gavin DeGraw
13. Skyscraper- Demi Lovato
12. Stronger- Mandisa
11. Own The Night- Lady Antebellum
10. Mr. Know It All- Kelly Clarkson
9. How To Love- Lil Wayne
8. If I Die Young- The Band Perry
7. It Will Rain- Bruno Mars
6. You and I- Lady Gaga
5. Forget You- Cee Lo Green
4. Born This Way- Lady Gaga
3. Someone Like You- Adele
2. Rolling in the Deep- Adele
1. Super Bass- Nicki Minaj
10 Favorite Non-Singles (all from albums/eps released in 2011).
10) Ooohsand Aah's- NeedtoBreathe
9) Just Cry-Mandisa
8) Broken Bird-Jack's Mannequin
7) We Believe-David Cook
6) Telephone Games- Jack and White
5) Wanted You More- Lady Antebellum
4) Sandcastles- Kate Voegele
3) Soldier- Gavin DeGraw
2) Honestly- Kelly Clarkson
1) Don't You Remember- Adele
10 Favorite Movies I saw
10) Breaking Dawn
9) Lion King
8) Country Strong
7) Harry Potter
6) Friends with Benefits
5) Water for Elephants
4) Crazy, Stupid Love
3) Bridesmaids
2) 50/50
1) The Help
10) Florence and the Machine- Ceremonials
9) Mandisa- What If We Were Real
8) Jack's Mannequin- People and Things
7) NeedtoBreathe- The Reckoning
6) David Cook- This Loud Morning
5) Kate Voegele-Gravity Happens
4) Gavin DeGraw- Sweeter
3) Lady Antebellum- Own The Night
2) Kelly Clarkson- Stronger
1) Adele- 21
10 Favorite Singles (Some albums were not released in 11, but these singles were)
Just so you know, this list originally had 50 songs on it. I made myself cut it to 15.
15. Headlines- Drake
14. Not Over You- Gavin DeGraw
13. Skyscraper- Demi Lovato
12. Stronger- Mandisa
11. Own The Night- Lady Antebellum
10. Mr. Know It All- Kelly Clarkson
9. How To Love- Lil Wayne
8. If I Die Young- The Band Perry
7. It Will Rain- Bruno Mars
6. You and I- Lady Gaga
5. Forget You- Cee Lo Green
4. Born This Way- Lady Gaga
3. Someone Like You- Adele
2. Rolling in the Deep- Adele
1. Super Bass- Nicki Minaj
10 Favorite Non-Singles (all from albums/eps released in 2011).
10) Ooohsand Aah's- NeedtoBreathe
9) Just Cry-Mandisa
8) Broken Bird-Jack's Mannequin
7) We Believe-David Cook
6) Telephone Games- Jack and White
5) Wanted You More- Lady Antebellum
4) Sandcastles- Kate Voegele
3) Soldier- Gavin DeGraw
2) Honestly- Kelly Clarkson
1) Don't You Remember- Adele
10 Favorite Movies I saw
10) Breaking Dawn
9) Lion King
8) Country Strong
7) Harry Potter
6) Friends with Benefits
5) Water for Elephants
4) Crazy, Stupid Love
3) Bridesmaids
2) 50/50
1) The Help
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
value
I've been in a crappy mood as of late. Can't get in the holiday spirit, feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and just plain burned out. It hit me today what I want: I want to feel valued. Not in the selfish way. I don't need people to tell me I'm awesome. I just want to feel like I am worth something. I want to feel like all my hard work is going somewhere. Like I am on the right path.
But then I also realized- the root of all of this is that I do not always value myself. I knock myself down all the time. Having other people acknowledge me or tell me how I'm doing will go nowhere unless I believe it. And, I have the control to believe that. I thought for a long time that I had finally learned to love myself, but it's evident lately that I still have not learned that very needed lesson. I wish I could. I pray about it all the time. I try. Yet, I still let things about myself slip through the cracks, while trying to hold everything else together. I like to be the person who helps others. It's time for me to help myself.
It's going to be hard but I am going to try to start doing things that are best for me. Being healthier, happier. I know, you can roll your eyes and say you've heard this before from me, because you have. And hey, there's a possibility I will fail and fall back into this pit that I have seen so many times before. But I'm going to fight harder, push further, than I ever have before.
So yes, I want to feel valued and worthy. And it all starts with me.
But then I also realized- the root of all of this is that I do not always value myself. I knock myself down all the time. Having other people acknowledge me or tell me how I'm doing will go nowhere unless I believe it. And, I have the control to believe that. I thought for a long time that I had finally learned to love myself, but it's evident lately that I still have not learned that very needed lesson. I wish I could. I pray about it all the time. I try. Yet, I still let things about myself slip through the cracks, while trying to hold everything else together. I like to be the person who helps others. It's time for me to help myself.
It's going to be hard but I am going to try to start doing things that are best for me. Being healthier, happier. I know, you can roll your eyes and say you've heard this before from me, because you have. And hey, there's a possibility I will fail and fall back into this pit that I have seen so many times before. But I'm going to fight harder, push further, than I ever have before.
So yes, I want to feel valued and worthy. And it all starts with me.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
I don't remember the last time I posted new writing. I usually post it to tumblr. So, here you are. Sorry if there are repeats!
"Comfortable"
July 2011
Don’t you remember the day we met
Exchanging glances and smiles
You walked over and said
You know I’ve got a thing for girls who are shy
We’ve been hand in hand ever since
And we don’t have to say a word
Comfortable with silence
Comfortable with you
I live to be loved
I live to be loved by you
Have I told you I adore you
For showing me a world I’ve never known
I told you I was a mess
You just took my hand
And we’ve been hand in hand ever since
And we don’t have to say a word
Comfortable with silence
Comfortable with you
I love to be loved
I love to be loved by you
Liars and Thieves
July 2011
Well, congratulations, sweets
You’ve made the list of liars and thieves
I’ve never added someone so fast
It’s gotta be some kind of record
Our story ended before it really began
I believed you when you said
“I’m not going anywhere”
You promised I wouldn’t get hurt
You made me feel safe, for once in my life
I turn around and you’re with her
Looks like you went somewhere
And I really thought you were different
I was under the impression
you were one of the nice guys
boy you had me fooled
I believed you when You said “I’m not going anywhere”
You promised I wouldn’t get hurt
You made me feel safe, for once in my life
I turn around and you’re with her
Looks like you went somewhere
So I wipe my hands clean of you
I won’t spend time wondering what I did
Because I’ve learned my worth
You said I was the sweetest thing you’d ever known
Well, You’re going to want to be careful
Cuz when it comes to breaking hearts
Im not so sweet
I believed you when You said “I’m not going anywhere”
You promised I wouldn’t get hurt
You made me feel safe, for once in my life
I turn around and you’re with her
Looks like you went somewhere
And I’ll be fine if I never hear from you again
I just wanted you to know
I’m so sick of liars and theives
Apology
August 2011
Which one of us will crack first?
Offer apologies for how
We’ve been acting lately
I guess it’s gonna be me
Since you’ve always had trouble
Admitting you wrong
But let’s be honest
This thing’s been over for years
Holding on by a thread
I know you had better ways to spend your time
I guess I’m sorry you wasted it on me
You just love to push me aside
But I was always there
And I’m sorry I’m just now seeing
You never really cared
You spill your soul to anything with ears
But they don’t know you like I do
And yet it’s been so long
I forget the sound of your voice
I can’t take this deadly silence between us
It was never this bad, never this torn
I don’t even know you
Maybe I’m sorry I ever did.
Oh No
August 2011
Oh no not you again
I’ve seen your type before
Sowhy don’t you make a quick exit
Oh no you went and smiled at me
Why’d you do that, don’t you know I’m weak
Let’s just forget this night we’ve had
Oh no, I can’t do this again
I always seem to fall for
You should leave before I get too attached
Oh no I think I’m falling for you
I know of wish I’d never met you
Oh no I did not mean that
I’m starting to think we could be
The beautifully written story
I’ve been waiting for
Oh no you just got down on one knee
This is love and you say “marry me”
What will I say, an you guess?
Oh, baby, you know it’s yes
Now you’re the heartbreaker
September 2011
Don’t take another step toward me
You’ve lost me now
Wasn’t that your biggest fear
So why’d you go and lie to me
And make those empty promises
When you knew how much I hated those
I would’ve given you my whole world
I would’ve been everything you wanted
It’s a damn shame you couldn’t see
I could’ve been the one for you
You looked me in the eyes and cupped my face
Don’t you remember that night in the park
I bet you take her there too
Bet you say those same beautiful lines
I would’ve given you my whole world
I woud’ve been everything you wanted
It’s a damn shame you couldn’t see
I could’ve been the one for you
How does it feel to be the heartbreaker
I wonder if you’re proud
I’m not sticking around to find out
You’ve lost me now
I would’ve given you my whole world
I wou’ve been everything you wanted
It’s a damn shame you coulnd’t see
I could’ve been the one for you.
He Lied She Stole
August 2011
The way we were talkin
You’d think we’d be headed to the church by now
But I haven’t heard from you in days
And I’m starting to think I’m losing you
Don’t you dare try to put this blame on me
Cuz when I said I miss you
You never said I miss you too
I pick up on the little things like that, love
And when I asked you what your day was like
You never cared about mine
I think I’ve lost your interest
I think your mind found someone new
So don’t tel me you don’t have time to talk
Cuz I think she’s been talkin to you
Now that I’m thinking about it
I might be better off without you
I’m remembering all our conversations
And how they were always about you
We went from head over heels in love
To two kids holding a grudge
I think I’ve lost your interest
I think your mind found someone new
So don’t tell me you don’t have time to talk
Cuz I think she’s been talkin to you
I just wanted to know where I stand
And now I’m standin alone
Bye bye, boy
October 2011
Hey, hey, boy
Settle down, let’s talk this out
You’re mad I’m walking away
Trying to say I broke your heart
You think I’m weak, don’t you boy?
Excuse me while I roll my eyes
Oh boy, you’ve got it all wrong
Yeah I gave you that second chance
And you just threw it away
Boy, I’ll be honest
I’m not feeling you anymore
I guess we lost that spark
I guess I came back down to earth
You should’ve used that chance
And done some proving this could work
But you proved why it’s all wrong
And I’ve realized, yeah boy I realized
There’s so many things about you
Well, things I just don’t like
You shouldn’t tell me about the other girls
You should get your act together
And you shouldn’t lie, no, you shouldn’t lie
So bye bye, boy
No I don’t put up with liars, boy
Courage
December 2011
I think I’m about to lose you
Before I even have you
All because I’m too scared too
Say “I need you”
You are just the type
I want to spend my days with
But you seem so happy without me
I wish I knew how to slip right into your life
I wish I knew how to capture your heart
Before you walk away and I lose my chance
I don’t wanna lose my chance with you
I’m hoping the courage rises
from my gut to my mouth
and I can finally speak
the words I wanna say to you
“You and I could be something great”
But you seem so happy without me
I wish I knew how to slip right into your life
I wish I knew how to capture your heart
Before you walk away and I lose my chance
I don’t wanna lose my chance with you
I don’t know yet if I want to be forever with you
But I don’t want to be forever alone
So let’s start with for now
Princess Worthy
December 2011
I heard once in a movie
all girls are princesses
what's that feel like
tonight I feel empty
tonight I'm not worthy
of a crown of any sort
tonight I feel ignored
and torn down to pieces
I am the stereotype
of a lonely girl, tonight
sitting alone in my room
listening to music that makes
even the strongest cry
and watching my tears hit the floor
wishing someone would come
through that door, tonight
and say didn't you know
all girls are princesses
and you're my princess
tonight
"Comfortable"
July 2011
Don’t you remember the day we met
Exchanging glances and smiles
You walked over and said
You know I’ve got a thing for girls who are shy
We’ve been hand in hand ever since
And we don’t have to say a word
Comfortable with silence
Comfortable with you
I live to be loved
I live to be loved by you
Have I told you I adore you
For showing me a world I’ve never known
I told you I was a mess
You just took my hand
And we’ve been hand in hand ever since
And we don’t have to say a word
Comfortable with silence
Comfortable with you
I love to be loved
I love to be loved by you
Liars and Thieves
July 2011
Well, congratulations, sweets
You’ve made the list of liars and thieves
I’ve never added someone so fast
It’s gotta be some kind of record
Our story ended before it really began
I believed you when you said
“I’m not going anywhere”
You promised I wouldn’t get hurt
You made me feel safe, for once in my life
I turn around and you’re with her
Looks like you went somewhere
And I really thought you were different
I was under the impression
you were one of the nice guys
boy you had me fooled
I believed you when You said “I’m not going anywhere”
You promised I wouldn’t get hurt
You made me feel safe, for once in my life
I turn around and you’re with her
Looks like you went somewhere
So I wipe my hands clean of you
I won’t spend time wondering what I did
Because I’ve learned my worth
You said I was the sweetest thing you’d ever known
Well, You’re going to want to be careful
Cuz when it comes to breaking hearts
Im not so sweet
I believed you when You said “I’m not going anywhere”
You promised I wouldn’t get hurt
You made me feel safe, for once in my life
I turn around and you’re with her
Looks like you went somewhere
And I’ll be fine if I never hear from you again
I just wanted you to know
I’m so sick of liars and theives
Apology
August 2011
Which one of us will crack first?
Offer apologies for how
We’ve been acting lately
I guess it’s gonna be me
Since you’ve always had trouble
Admitting you wrong
But let’s be honest
This thing’s been over for years
Holding on by a thread
I know you had better ways to spend your time
I guess I’m sorry you wasted it on me
You just love to push me aside
But I was always there
And I’m sorry I’m just now seeing
You never really cared
You spill your soul to anything with ears
But they don’t know you like I do
And yet it’s been so long
I forget the sound of your voice
I can’t take this deadly silence between us
It was never this bad, never this torn
I don’t even know you
Maybe I’m sorry I ever did.
Oh No
August 2011
Oh no not you again
I’ve seen your type before
Sowhy don’t you make a quick exit
Oh no you went and smiled at me
Why’d you do that, don’t you know I’m weak
Let’s just forget this night we’ve had
Oh no, I can’t do this again
I always seem to fall for
You should leave before I get too attached
Oh no I think I’m falling for you
I know of wish I’d never met you
Oh no I did not mean that
I’m starting to think we could be
The beautifully written story
I’ve been waiting for
Oh no you just got down on one knee
This is love and you say “marry me”
What will I say, an you guess?
Oh, baby, you know it’s yes
Now you’re the heartbreaker
September 2011
Don’t take another step toward me
You’ve lost me now
Wasn’t that your biggest fear
So why’d you go and lie to me
And make those empty promises
When you knew how much I hated those
I would’ve given you my whole world
I would’ve been everything you wanted
It’s a damn shame you couldn’t see
I could’ve been the one for you
You looked me in the eyes and cupped my face
Don’t you remember that night in the park
I bet you take her there too
Bet you say those same beautiful lines
I would’ve given you my whole world
I woud’ve been everything you wanted
It’s a damn shame you couldn’t see
I could’ve been the one for you
How does it feel to be the heartbreaker
I wonder if you’re proud
I’m not sticking around to find out
You’ve lost me now
I would’ve given you my whole world
I wou’ve been everything you wanted
It’s a damn shame you coulnd’t see
I could’ve been the one for you.
He Lied She Stole
August 2011
The way we were talkin
You’d think we’d be headed to the church by now
But I haven’t heard from you in days
And I’m starting to think I’m losing you
Don’t you dare try to put this blame on me
Cuz when I said I miss you
You never said I miss you too
I pick up on the little things like that, love
And when I asked you what your day was like
You never cared about mine
I think I’ve lost your interest
I think your mind found someone new
So don’t tel me you don’t have time to talk
Cuz I think she’s been talkin to you
Now that I’m thinking about it
I might be better off without you
I’m remembering all our conversations
And how they were always about you
We went from head over heels in love
To two kids holding a grudge
I think I’ve lost your interest
I think your mind found someone new
So don’t tell me you don’t have time to talk
Cuz I think she’s been talkin to you
I just wanted to know where I stand
And now I’m standin alone
Bye bye, boy
October 2011
Hey, hey, boy
Settle down, let’s talk this out
You’re mad I’m walking away
Trying to say I broke your heart
You think I’m weak, don’t you boy?
Excuse me while I roll my eyes
Oh boy, you’ve got it all wrong
Yeah I gave you that second chance
And you just threw it away
Boy, I’ll be honest
I’m not feeling you anymore
I guess we lost that spark
I guess I came back down to earth
You should’ve used that chance
And done some proving this could work
But you proved why it’s all wrong
And I’ve realized, yeah boy I realized
There’s so many things about you
Well, things I just don’t like
You shouldn’t tell me about the other girls
You should get your act together
And you shouldn’t lie, no, you shouldn’t lie
So bye bye, boy
No I don’t put up with liars, boy
Courage
December 2011
I think I’m about to lose you
Before I even have you
All because I’m too scared too
Say “I need you”
You are just the type
I want to spend my days with
But you seem so happy without me
I wish I knew how to slip right into your life
I wish I knew how to capture your heart
Before you walk away and I lose my chance
I don’t wanna lose my chance with you
I’m hoping the courage rises
from my gut to my mouth
and I can finally speak
the words I wanna say to you
“You and I could be something great”
But you seem so happy without me
I wish I knew how to slip right into your life
I wish I knew how to capture your heart
Before you walk away and I lose my chance
I don’t wanna lose my chance with you
I don’t know yet if I want to be forever with you
But I don’t want to be forever alone
So let’s start with for now
Princess Worthy
December 2011
I heard once in a movie
all girls are princesses
what's that feel like
tonight I feel empty
tonight I'm not worthy
of a crown of any sort
tonight I feel ignored
and torn down to pieces
I am the stereotype
of a lonely girl, tonight
sitting alone in my room
listening to music that makes
even the strongest cry
and watching my tears hit the floor
wishing someone would come
through that door, tonight
and say didn't you know
all girls are princesses
and you're my princess
tonight
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
don't give up
I wish I knew why bad days happen, why funks happen, why suddenly your entire world feels like it's crashing down. Sometimes, life just sucks. Sometimes it feels too much to bear. And you know that? Regardless of what society says, that's okay. Break down. Cry. Throw something. Use a voo doo doll. Just don't give up.
People are going to tell you that you can't do it. You're going to tell yourself that you can't do it. You will make mistakes. You will be a step behind, sometimes. You won't always have the answers. Sometimes it feels like it's game over, there's nothing else you can do. Sometimes you're standing alone with no one by your side. Sometimes you don't think you can take one more step.
You can. You have the strength to move forward. You can win. You have your entire life ahead of you, still. Each day is a blessing, and it is your choice to do something about it, to love as much as you can and to give life every fighting chance. God created you, yes, you, especially for a certain path. You can't lose sight of that. There is too much good in you, too much worth, to shut it all down.
Quitting is the worst thing you can do. Quitting is not giving yourself a fair chance. You are not allowing yourself to be the best person you can be, you will never know what you are capable of. You are not showering the world with your gifts, if you give up.
So don't give up. Fight the fight. Your dreams are in reach.
People are going to tell you that you can't do it. You're going to tell yourself that you can't do it. You will make mistakes. You will be a step behind, sometimes. You won't always have the answers. Sometimes it feels like it's game over, there's nothing else you can do. Sometimes you're standing alone with no one by your side. Sometimes you don't think you can take one more step.
You can. You have the strength to move forward. You can win. You have your entire life ahead of you, still. Each day is a blessing, and it is your choice to do something about it, to love as much as you can and to give life every fighting chance. God created you, yes, you, especially for a certain path. You can't lose sight of that. There is too much good in you, too much worth, to shut it all down.
Quitting is the worst thing you can do. Quitting is not giving yourself a fair chance. You are not allowing yourself to be the best person you can be, you will never know what you are capable of. You are not showering the world with your gifts, if you give up.
So don't give up. Fight the fight. Your dreams are in reach.
Friday, December 2, 2011
100 things I love.
10 Activities
being inches away from a stage at a concert for an artists i adore
going on a road trip with my best friend on the passenger side and our favorite music playing
being nervous during a volleyball game, but feeling intense satisfaction after I slam the ball down
talking to kids and hearing their stories, fears, jokes.
getting lost in a book
watching a movie and connecting to a character
taking a life experience and putting it on paper in song/poem format
seeing the impact very selfless people make on people who are at the end of life
spending an entire day dedicated to just me
discovering new things
10 Restaurants
a little piece of heaven in a crepe, good girls go to paris
my happy go lucky barista at starbucks who gives me my venti skinny vanilla latte and spinach feta egg white wrap once a week
my staple veggie panini, red ox
special occasions galore at cheescake factory
family breakfast after church at leo's coney island
memories of bonding with college roomates at applebee's
the "worth the two hour wait" bbq at slow's
high tide in ft walton beach florida brings back the smell of the sand and ocean and the feel of sunburned cheeks
hot guys around a hot grill at mongolian bbq.
10 People
I'm just gonna name the first 10 people that come to mind.
Aunt Mary Ann
Bonny
Katie G (Although I guess she is now Katie A)
Alicia
Christine
Dave A
Nate
J Bizz
Meg Mal
Jena
10 Foods
Crunchy, juicy chicken fingers
a thai dish with noodles, peanut sauce, and tofu
white bean chicken chili on a sunday afternoon
my "I could eat every night for the rest of my life" food, salmon
sweet potatos with a smidge of butter and cinnamon
quesedilla's filled with veggies
snack time- pita and hummus
spinach and feta omlette for a sunday morning
b-a-n-a-n-a-s
lame, but I'm all about a good hearty sandwich.
10 Places
sand between my toes, ft walton beach florida
beautiful disaster: detroit
someday I'll be living in Nashville, TN
never been but dream about new york city
ireland, my homeland :-)
she said I think I'll go to Boston
anywhere off north I75 in the summer time for a quick getaway
indianapolis to see my brother and sister in law
australia for the accents, mate
chi town, baby
6 Drinks/Beverages
deliciously dangerous yin yangs
childlike chocolate milk
quenching vitamin water
addictive coffee
got me through finals in college, diet coke. particularly in the shape of a "den pop".
iced tea, unsweetened. i'm a plain kinda gal.
4 Desserts
summetime treat- vanilla ice cream with sprinkles
holiday favorite- warm apple pie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream
something small and sweet- Oreos
would stab someone for- red velvet cheescake
10 Songs (at the moment)
You Love Me (Kelly Clarkson)
Headlines (Drake)
Baby It's Cold Outside (Casey Abrams and Haley Reinhart)
Telephone Games (Jack and White)
Love Is Christmas (Sara Barielles)
Valerie (Amy Winehouse)
Own The Night (Lady Antebellum)
Ours (Taylor Swift)
Sexy and I know It (LMFAO)
It Will Rain (Bruno Mars)
10 Web Sites
tiwttah to promote and engage
facebook to keep up with friends and family and share things that make me happy
tumblr to fangirl
blogspot for my thoughts
pintrest for fresh ideas
stumbleupon for a bordedom cure
google for everything and anything
melindasbackups.com for feel good
pandora to keep my ears happy
10 Writers
Jen Lancaster
Emma Donoghue
Emily Dickinson
J.D Salinger
JK Rowling (Thank you, Miss)
Kathyrn Stockett
Amy Tan
Lisa Genova
Jodi Picolut (I'm such a girl)
10 Famous lines from movies
can you name what movie each of these are from?
"just keep swimming"- FINDING NEMO
"You know that place between sleep and awake? That place where you still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you... . That's where I'll be waiting"- HOOK
"A heart is not judged by how much you love; but by how much you are loved by others."- WIZARD OF OZ
"Dear God, make me a bird. So I could fly far. Far far away from here."- FORREST GUMP
"You is kind. You is smart. You is important."- THE HELP
"You always said how lucky you were that we were all friends. But it was us, baby, who were the lucky ones"- RENT
"What we have here is a failure to communicate"- COOL HAND LUKE
"I could die right now, Clem. I'm just... happy. I've never felt that before. I'm just exactly where I want to be."- ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND
"As we grow older, it becomes difficult to just believe. It's not that we don't want to, but too much has happened and we can't."- NOW AND THEN
being inches away from a stage at a concert for an artists i adore
going on a road trip with my best friend on the passenger side and our favorite music playing
being nervous during a volleyball game, but feeling intense satisfaction after I slam the ball down
talking to kids and hearing their stories, fears, jokes.
getting lost in a book
watching a movie and connecting to a character
taking a life experience and putting it on paper in song/poem format
seeing the impact very selfless people make on people who are at the end of life
spending an entire day dedicated to just me
discovering new things
10 Restaurants
a little piece of heaven in a crepe, good girls go to paris
my happy go lucky barista at starbucks who gives me my venti skinny vanilla latte and spinach feta egg white wrap once a week
my staple veggie panini, red ox
special occasions galore at cheescake factory
family breakfast after church at leo's coney island
memories of bonding with college roomates at applebee's
the "worth the two hour wait" bbq at slow's
high tide in ft walton beach florida brings back the smell of the sand and ocean and the feel of sunburned cheeks
hot guys around a hot grill at mongolian bbq.
10 People
I'm just gonna name the first 10 people that come to mind.
Aunt Mary Ann
Bonny
Katie G (Although I guess she is now Katie A)
Alicia
Christine
Dave A
Nate
J Bizz
Meg Mal
Jena
10 Foods
Crunchy, juicy chicken fingers
a thai dish with noodles, peanut sauce, and tofu
white bean chicken chili on a sunday afternoon
my "I could eat every night for the rest of my life" food, salmon
sweet potatos with a smidge of butter and cinnamon
quesedilla's filled with veggies
snack time- pita and hummus
spinach and feta omlette for a sunday morning
b-a-n-a-n-a-s
lame, but I'm all about a good hearty sandwich.
10 Places
sand between my toes, ft walton beach florida
beautiful disaster: detroit
someday I'll be living in Nashville, TN
never been but dream about new york city
ireland, my homeland :-)
she said I think I'll go to Boston
anywhere off north I75 in the summer time for a quick getaway
indianapolis to see my brother and sister in law
australia for the accents, mate
chi town, baby
6 Drinks/Beverages
deliciously dangerous yin yangs
childlike chocolate milk
quenching vitamin water
addictive coffee
got me through finals in college, diet coke. particularly in the shape of a "den pop".
iced tea, unsweetened. i'm a plain kinda gal.
4 Desserts
summetime treat- vanilla ice cream with sprinkles
holiday favorite- warm apple pie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream
something small and sweet- Oreos
would stab someone for- red velvet cheescake
10 Songs (at the moment)
You Love Me (Kelly Clarkson)
Headlines (Drake)
Baby It's Cold Outside (Casey Abrams and Haley Reinhart)
Telephone Games (Jack and White)
Love Is Christmas (Sara Barielles)
Valerie (Amy Winehouse)
Own The Night (Lady Antebellum)
Ours (Taylor Swift)
Sexy and I know It (LMFAO)
It Will Rain (Bruno Mars)
10 Web Sites
tiwttah to promote and engage
facebook to keep up with friends and family and share things that make me happy
tumblr to fangirl
blogspot for my thoughts
pintrest for fresh ideas
stumbleupon for a bordedom cure
google for everything and anything
melindasbackups.com for feel good
pandora to keep my ears happy
10 Writers
Jen Lancaster
Emma Donoghue
Emily Dickinson
J.D Salinger
JK Rowling (Thank you, Miss)
Kathyrn Stockett
Amy Tan
Lisa Genova
Jodi Picolut (I'm such a girl)
10 Famous lines from movies
can you name what movie each of these are from?
"just keep swimming"- FINDING NEMO
"You know that place between sleep and awake? That place where you still remember dreaming? That's where I'll always love you... . That's where I'll be waiting"- HOOK
"A heart is not judged by how much you love; but by how much you are loved by others."- WIZARD OF OZ
"Dear God, make me a bird. So I could fly far. Far far away from here."- FORREST GUMP
"You is kind. You is smart. You is important."- THE HELP
"You always said how lucky you were that we were all friends. But it was us, baby, who were the lucky ones"- RENT
"What we have here is a failure to communicate"- COOL HAND LUKE
"I could die right now, Clem. I'm just... happy. I've never felt that before. I'm just exactly where I want to be."- ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND
"As we grow older, it becomes difficult to just believe. It's not that we don't want to, but too much has happened and we can't."- NOW AND THEN
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Who brings out the best in you?
Who brings out the best in you?
Hmm. I suppose for me this means people who I am my complete self around. My best complete self.
My family. This wasn't always the case, I guess. I used to be much quieter around my family. I used to feel inferior. Not anymore. I love my family and I love the happy feelings I get around them. I love how we can laugh for hours over silly things and be totally honest with one another. I like that we can help each other and be proud of one another and how much we show our care for each other. Around my family, I am complete.
The Sisters of Mercy. They bring out the best in me, spiritually. They take me to a whole new level of life and love. They remind me of what I am capable of. They teach me how to be a better person. They show me a fresh, beautiful outlook on life. I know it sounds crazy to some people but whenever I am at a Sisters of Mercy event, I feel like I am home. They are absolutely fascinating women with a purpose and a passion, and they inspire me to be true to myself and to recognize my talents. Around the Sisters of Mercy, I am love.
My friends Alicia, Sam, Dean, and Christine. They are four of my best friends and four of the people I love the most in this world. They know me inside and out, they know my strengths and weaknesses, they know what makes me laugh. Most importantly, they know my worth, and they remind me of that. They each bring something unique to my life and I love how happy I am when I am around them. (And even happier that I will get to spend 2-3 days a week with Christine because she just got a job at my company!) Around these friends, I am life.
The backups, and Melinda, more than anyone else, have taught me how to be brave- and I feel brave around them. The backups are special because they have watched me grow up. In some ways even more so than my family, because for a while it was the backups hearing my secrets and stories more than anyone else. They accepted me through it all, which made me a more confidant person and a stronger person. Around the backups and Melinda, I am brave.
Cristo Rey High School. Cristo Rey gave me a wonderful experience and an opportunity to grow. The staff helped me learn how to be a Christian servant, and the kids taught me about gratitude and simplicity. The year I spent in that school was the best year of my life and I miss it daily. When I go back and visit I feel whole again. Around Cristo Rey, I am fulfilled.
The artists who have given me the opportunity to lose myself in their music, even in a crowded room of people. Who have allowed me to connect to their life and stories and songs. Who have allowed me to be dancing one minute and crying the next because their song reminds me of a person or event. When I am at concerts with these artists, I am free.
God. God brings out the best in me every single day. He picks me up whenever I fall. He never lets me down. He provides me with people and things that I need to get by. He loves me, unconditionally. He gives me life every day. He leads the way. He reminds me what to do when I am troubled. He puts me at peace when I am anxious. He gives me strength. He is my rock. I am Me because God is here with me.
Who brings out the best in you, kids?
Hmm. I suppose for me this means people who I am my complete self around. My best complete self.
My family. This wasn't always the case, I guess. I used to be much quieter around my family. I used to feel inferior. Not anymore. I love my family and I love the happy feelings I get around them. I love how we can laugh for hours over silly things and be totally honest with one another. I like that we can help each other and be proud of one another and how much we show our care for each other. Around my family, I am complete.
The Sisters of Mercy. They bring out the best in me, spiritually. They take me to a whole new level of life and love. They remind me of what I am capable of. They teach me how to be a better person. They show me a fresh, beautiful outlook on life. I know it sounds crazy to some people but whenever I am at a Sisters of Mercy event, I feel like I am home. They are absolutely fascinating women with a purpose and a passion, and they inspire me to be true to myself and to recognize my talents. Around the Sisters of Mercy, I am love.
My friends Alicia, Sam, Dean, and Christine. They are four of my best friends and four of the people I love the most in this world. They know me inside and out, they know my strengths and weaknesses, they know what makes me laugh. Most importantly, they know my worth, and they remind me of that. They each bring something unique to my life and I love how happy I am when I am around them. (And even happier that I will get to spend 2-3 days a week with Christine because she just got a job at my company!) Around these friends, I am life.
The backups, and Melinda, more than anyone else, have taught me how to be brave- and I feel brave around them. The backups are special because they have watched me grow up. In some ways even more so than my family, because for a while it was the backups hearing my secrets and stories more than anyone else. They accepted me through it all, which made me a more confidant person and a stronger person. Around the backups and Melinda, I am brave.
Cristo Rey High School. Cristo Rey gave me a wonderful experience and an opportunity to grow. The staff helped me learn how to be a Christian servant, and the kids taught me about gratitude and simplicity. The year I spent in that school was the best year of my life and I miss it daily. When I go back and visit I feel whole again. Around Cristo Rey, I am fulfilled.
The artists who have given me the opportunity to lose myself in their music, even in a crowded room of people. Who have allowed me to connect to their life and stories and songs. Who have allowed me to be dancing one minute and crying the next because their song reminds me of a person or event. When I am at concerts with these artists, I am free.
God. God brings out the best in me every single day. He picks me up whenever I fall. He never lets me down. He provides me with people and things that I need to get by. He loves me, unconditionally. He gives me life every day. He leads the way. He reminds me what to do when I am troubled. He puts me at peace when I am anxious. He gives me strength. He is my rock. I am Me because God is here with me.
Who brings out the best in you, kids?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)