It's so strange, the emotions we fill by simply seeing an old friend. I've always been a sensitive, nostalgic person who isn't a big fan of change. So last year, when I had to pack up and leave my house in Corktown, say goodbye to the best year of my life, it was a challenge. But, for the firt time in my life, I didn't spend every single minute thinking about it, missing it. Instead, I decided it would be best to move on. So I did. Quickly. Instead, I spent all of my time trying to find a job. I totally pushed my year of MVC out of my mind. Not exactly healthy. I wish I had found a balance between the two. Because sometimes, I honestly feel like last year did not happen. That it was all just a dream. And that's terribly sad, considering all that it blesed me with.
This past weekend, one of my roomies from last year, Nate, came into town. I'll be honest, we haven't spoken very often since we said our goodbyes last July. But, like I said above, I wasn't focused on that. It was so wonderful to see Nate. He seemed happy, which made me happy. It was a relief that our friendship had not changed. He was still his sarcastic self, cracking jokes left and right, but also looking at me with sincerity and compassion when I was talking with him. I loved hanging out with him again. Another thing that made it so great was that his old supervisor stoppped by, and the happiness in her eyes seeing him was beautiful. She and the MV this year who took his place were going on and on about how people at his old job missed him and constantly asked about him. I was so proud of Nate for that, for making an impact on people. I know that as he goes through med school he will continue to do so. I am very lucky to have Nate as one of my best friends. Now it's my turn to go visit him...and I'm going to do my best to make sure to keep in contact with him.
So, seeing Nate was fabulous, but it made me feel awful for not keeping in touch with him, or Dave and Katie. It doesn't mean I don't miss them, because I do. They will always be three of my best friends, and the year I shared with them was the greatest year of my life.
On Sunday, I spent time with Cristo Rey kids when I took them to the Lupus Walk at the Detroit Zoo. We had an absolute blast. It was fun to see the kids just act like kids, because I know they don't get to do that often. Plus I was super proud of Jasmine for her passion for the cause and raising so much money. But, like Nate, it also made me a little sad. I just miss them.
I know things change, but I think I tried to force them to change too quickly this time. People warned me about getting stuck with last year, wanting to hold on forever..and I did the complete opposite of that. I pushed it away. I didn't realize it until I tutored at Cristo Rey a few times, and even more so when I saw Nate.
I love you all. Thanks for the constant support. I know this blog won't make much sense to anyone, but I just had to get it out.