Latest Life Lessons....

Lately, I've found myself saying the following phrases either to myself or to people around me. I hope they may serve as a gentle reminder for you, too.

• You are not defined by a number. You are not your age, you are not your salary, you are not the number on the scale, you are not the grade you get on a test or your rank at your work evaluation. You are a person, who is unique and full of wonderful qualities, and you are not defined by a number.
  
• When you are anxious, you are going to want to take it out on the people closest to you. Don't. Or, if you do, remember to apologize, to ask for forgiveness, and to remind that person how much you love them. Go for a walk, write down your emotions, listen to music, do some yoga- try your best not to lash out on your loved ones.
  
• Do not shame others for what they eat. This is such a pet peeve of mine. I'm certain I'm guilty of it as well- like when I ask Tom how he can possibly eat Taco Bell. But I absolutely cringe when I see posts or hear people criticize others for their food choices. Sure, I am all about being healthy. But good gracious, let a person make their own choices, and don't make them feel guilty for it. Food is already such a touchy subject- you don't know what kind of eating disorders a person may have. Eat the way you want to eat, and let others do the same.
  
• Do not read the comments section on news articles. You know it will just make you upset. I am all about sharing our opinions in this political age, and I don't think it's the time to be silent, but I also know that for my mental health, I can't read those comments.
  
• If you're going through a really hard time, it's okay to tell people. They may not understand, and they may not have a response, but I think it's important for the people around you to know that you are struggling.
  
• Thank your coworkers. They may not know how much you appreciate them helping you with a project. Or, they may think no one notices how hard they work. Send little appreciation notes here and there, spread the love in your workplace. It helps boost morale, you will make someones day, and you'll probably feel a little bit brighter yourself.
  
• Everyone has a different idea of what life's checklist should look like. Your goals will not match my goals. Your idea of happiness is probably not my idea of happiness. What you define as successful may not be my definition. The way you picture a family to look like may not be what I envision as a family.  We've got to understand that all of us come from different paths in life, and all of us are going about this thing in our own way. So long as we are happy (our own version of happy), there's no right or wrong way to do it. 

That's it for now, folks. Just keep living life, spreading love and doing the best you can.

My hope for you...

This Valentine's Day, and every single day of your life...

I hope you know that you matter.

There are people who love you, even when it feels like the world is against you.

Your thoughts and your words are important.

Your creativity is needed.

Your dreams can become a reality.

You have the ability to make a difference.

Your fears do not make you crazy, and you are allowed to be afraid.

You are worth it.

You are enough.

I hope you know that you deserve the love shown to you.

I hope you know that if someone is treating you poorly, it's okay to leave them behind.

Self care is not selfish, and it is needed.

You are stronger than you think.

Even if you feel weak, or hopeless, or helpless, you are not alone. 

You are beautiful.

You don't have to be the hero.

It's okay to have an off day- or week- or month.

I hope you know, I want you to be here. 

I want you to feel love.

I want you to see the love that surrounds you.

I want you to BE love.

It's not about the flowers or the candy or the cards.

It's not about going overboard to show your love and affection.

It's about celebrating love, in all it's forms, today and every day.

You are loved.

You matter.

You are enough.

Remembering how to embrace every moment.

Lately, I've found myself eagerly looking ahead. I am constantly looking at my calendar, both work and socially, to see what my next "thing" is. I keep a close watch on my wedding and honeymoon countdown.

I don't know if it's because I'm ready for spring and warmer weather, or all the fun outings, concerts, and adventures that spring and summer bring.I don't know if it's because world events have been getting to me and consuming my brain. All I know is, I keep looking ahead, wishing time would go by faster.

Yesterday I had to give myself a stern talking to. WHY am I looking ahead when I know the importance of living in the moment and cherishing every step of life?

I've written about this before. I bet I could find at least a dozen blog posts that I have written about the importance of living in the moment and taking life day by day.

So why is that so easy to forget? Why is it easier to want to rush through life, only stopping at the really exciting moments?

Why can't I realize that every moment of life IS really exciting because I am a living, breathing human being who is given a chance to truly make a mark on this world?

I want to learn to truly be okay with every moment of life without wishing it would go faster. I want to remember that we are not guaranteed another day, so we should make the most of each one we do have. I want to remember to make sure my friends and family know how loved and appreciated they are, before it's too late.

It's nice to have things to look forward to, of course. I think they motivate me, they spark a little flame inside of me. But I don't want to depend on those things to be my sole source of happiness, only to be sad and even let down when they are over.

I will be grateful for every day.

Or at least, I will try.

How do you live in the moment?